Any good jokes ... ?

[TheDoctor]

Teo drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.


Ba Dum Tschhhhhh!

 

[TVC]

Statistically speaking, not everyone was kung fu fighting, some must have been doing the ironing or brushing their teeth.

 

[TheDoctor]

I'd estimate about 1% of the world was taught to sing, at the very most.
And their harmony was far from perfect IMHO.

I'm not sure what makes the world go round, but I'm fairly sure it isn't fat bottomed girls.

 

[Smartarse]

 

[betty swollocks]

A horse walks into a bar and the barkeeper comments,
"You're in here a lot, are you an alcoholic?"
The horse ponders for a moment and responds,
"I don't think I am."
This is where philosophy students start to chortle, as they are familiar with Descartes' postulation, 'I think therefore I am.'
But telling you that first would be putting Descartes before the horse.

 

[morrisman]

I have a T-Rex locally who sells handguns.

He's a small arms dealer.

 

[morrisman]

When does a joke become a dad joke?

When the punchline becomes apparent.

 

[TwickenhamCyclist]

Reminds me of the OTT sketch


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7c6_uxLOVk

There was also another in Alexia Sayle's own show, where he answers the door dressed as Joseph. Can't find it though

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HXxzVuE_D1k

 

[Threevok]

A White horse walks into a bar.
The barman remarks "Did you know there's a drink named after you?"
The horse replies "Kevin ?"

 

[Licramite]

poppa tomato , mom tomato and baby tomato are walking down the street and baby tomato keeps dropping behind
poppa tomato turns squished him - and say's- "ketchup"

 

[Leaway2]

poppa tomato , mom tomato and baby tomato are walking down the street and baby tomato keeps dropping behind
poppa tomato turns squished him - and say's- "ketchup"

Mia's joke in Pulp fiction.

 

[Fonze]

My friend had bad bellyache, and each time he touched his tummy it sang " the green green grass of home "
So off he pops to the doctors, he tells him all this and the doctor says " you've got Tom Jones'itus "
Tom Jones ' itus , is it common ? To which the Doctor sings " it's not unusual ........... "

 

[Smokin Joe]

I do wish people would learn to call me "Sir" without always having to add "You're causing a scene".

 

[lutonloony]

The little vegetable lost his voice, turned out he was a horse radish

 

[TVC]

The little vegetable lost his voice, turned out he was a horse radish

Started on the Christmas crackers early this year I see