True Facts About Chris Rea

[Dogtrousers]

And Austin Powers, just like Accy Cyclist has a fine interest in clothes, they are both Dandy peacocks, but I can't say Accy is as Shagadelic.... 'yeah ,Baby Yeah !

Well, we can't say that with certainty. But let's face it, it's pretty probable.

 

[lazybloke]

Filming has just been abandoned on the latest episode of Mastermind after a contestant reacted angrily to scoring zero in his chosen specialist subject, The life and times of Chris Rea.
In the fracas that followed, the contestant turned out to be Chris Rea in disguise.
"The questions are nonsense", he protested.
"No they're not", said the production team, "we researched them all on Cyclechat."

 

[PeteXXX]

Chris Rea is so special that, instead of a Star on Hollywood Boulevard, he has a dodecahedrhon.

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea is in trouble after giving practical joker Dennis Hopper a lift home. If the TURDIS drops below 50% of light speed a bomb will go off in the Auberge Field generator.

 

[grldtnr]

I just asked on Chat GPT, ' Does Chris Rea have a time machine? '
It replied, no , but the idea that he does stems from his hit album 'The road To hell' , its more about reminiscing of bad times.

It did state that Chat GBT,could not be held to account for inaccuracies, .......so was his album Road to Hell a hit ......or does he actually own a time machine.
Hmmmm ,now that's a poser......

 

[lazybloke]

I just asked on Chat GPT, ' Does Chris Rea have a time machine? '
It replied, no , but the idea that he does stems from his hit album 'The road To hell' , its more about reminiscing of bad times.

Bored of dressing-up for historical re-enactments, Chris Rea acquired his TURDIS to make actual visits to medieval times.
One of his first trips was a search for the court of King Arthur.

At the time, North Cornwall was a contender as the location of Camelot, hence his song that chronicled his quest: "ye road to Hayle".
The song failed to enter the wandering minstrel top 10, but was a commercial success a millenium later, thanks to a modern rewrite of the lyrics.

 

[Dogtrousers]

Chris Rea is a musician from the North East of England. He had a sort of hit once called "Road to Hell".

Not a lot of people know that.

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea is chairman of the Ken Barlow fan club.

 

[Dogtrousers]

Chris Rea likes to dress up as Ivy Tilsley

 

[raleighnut]

Chris Rea likes to dress up as Ivy Tilsley

He's got the beard for it

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea played hard-man Brian Tilsley in Coronation Street.

Little acting involved as Rea is naturally hard as nails.

The death scene where Tilsley was stabbed to death was, by judicious use of the TURDIS, watched by 71 billion people.

 

[Dogtrousers]

As an aside, I was informed by friend, who was in turn informed by a friend (insert chain of friends) who had some sort of amour with Brian Tilsley that he kept his socks on

 

[Drago]

Brian tilsley kept his socks on while having relations with Gail as Chris Rea's feet were bdly burned by the leaking Auberge Field of the TURDIS.

 

[Dogtrousers]

Albert Tatlock was Chris Rea's biological father.

 

[Drago]

Due to his persistent pollution of the timeline by over zealous use of the TURDIS, Chris Rea is his own Mother.