Thomk
Guru
- Location
- Warwickshire
Me - now you've got a list of two things you've got to do
Mrs Thomk - is two things a list?
Mrs Thomk - is two things a list?
Give me some dialogue from your day
- Thread starter Crackle
- Start date
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gbb
Squire
- Location
- Peterborough
A bit of background...
I weighed 10.5 stone most of my life, moderate ill health over the last 18 months has seen me mostly off the bike and putting on some, for the first time in my life, weight, I'm now 11.5 stone.
The wife is doing some ironing...
'Do you still wear this shirt ?'
'Oh yes, I like that one...although it might be a bit small now, some of my stuff is a bit tight now, look, I've even got a bit of man boobs'...as I cup my chest
Within a second or two, i turn round to see the wife offering me one of her bras off the ironing pile
I weighed 10.5 stone most of my life, moderate ill health over the last 18 months has seen me mostly off the bike and putting on some, for the first time in my life, weight, I'm now 11.5 stone.
The wife is doing some ironing...
'Do you still wear this shirt ?'
'Oh yes, I like that one...although it might be a bit small now, some of my stuff is a bit tight now, look, I've even got a bit of man boobs'...as I cup my chest
Within a second or two, i turn round to see the wife offering me one of her bras off the ironing pile
Yeah, like you've never tried on her underwear beforeA bit of background...
I weighed 10.5 stone most of my life, moderate ill health over the last 18 months has seen me mostly off the bike and putting on some, for the first time in my life, weight, I'm now 11.5 stone.
The wife is doing some ironing...
'Do you still wear this shirt ?'
'Oh yes, I like that one...although it might be a bit small now, some of my stuff is a bit tight now, look, I've even got a bit of man boobs'...as I cup my chest
Within a second or two, i turn round to see the wife offering me one of her bras off the ironing pile
That's one of the advantages of not being overweight.Yeah, like you've never tried on her underwear before
vernon
Harder than Ronnie Pickering
- Location
- Meanwood, Leeds
Wife: 'I really like the lilac by the back door.'
Me: (silent - trying to visualise the lilac by the back door and failing only coming up with a lilac tree in the garden of the house two doors away)
Wife: 'We must get some cuttings from it before it goes'
Me: (silent - now dwelling on the legality of taking cuttings from the back garden of the uninhabited house two doors away)
Wife: 'The builders will wreck it when they start'
Me: 'Have you seen our new neighbours then?'
Wife: 'What are you talking about?'
Me: 'The house that's just been sold - when are the builders starting work on it?'
Wife: 'Why the sudden interest in two doors down?'
Me: 'The lilac tree in the back - you wanted cuttings before the builders wreck it.'
Wife: 'Did I say lilac? - I meant lavender'
Me: 'There's no lavender in the back or by the back door.'
Wife: 'Did I say back door? I meant front door. You should have known what I meant!
Me:
Me: (silent - trying to visualise the lilac by the back door and failing only coming up with a lilac tree in the garden of the house two doors away)
Wife: 'We must get some cuttings from it before it goes'
Me: (silent - now dwelling on the legality of taking cuttings from the back garden of the uninhabited house two doors away)
Wife: 'The builders will wreck it when they start'
Me: 'Have you seen our new neighbours then?'
Wife: 'What are you talking about?'
Me: 'The house that's just been sold - when are the builders starting work on it?'
Wife: 'Why the sudden interest in two doors down?'
Me: 'The lilac tree in the back - you wanted cuttings before the builders wreck it.'
Wife: 'Did I say lilac? - I meant lavender'
Me: 'There's no lavender in the back or by the back door.'
Wife: 'Did I say back door? I meant front door. You should have known what I meant!
Me:
swee'pea99
Legendary Member
Lanzecki
Über Member
- Location
- A Boreen, Ireland
That's one of the DISadvantages of not being overweight.
FTFY
Admittedly the bras won't fit, but the sussies and knickers are ok.
Lullabelle
Banana
- Location
- Midlands UK
Wife: 'I really like the lilac by the back door.'
Me: (silent - trying to visualise the lilac by the back door and failing only coming up with a lilac tree in the garden of the house two doors away)
Wife: 'We must get some cuttings from it before it goes'
Me: (silent - now dwelling on the legality of taking cuttings from the back garden of the uninhabited house two doors away)
Wife: 'The builders will wreck it when they start'
Me: 'Have you seen our new neighbours then?'
Wife: 'What are you talking about?'
Me: 'The house that's just been sold - when are the builders starting work on it?'
Wife: 'Why the sudden interest in two doors down?'
Me: 'The lilac tree in the back - you wanted cuttings before the builders wreck it.'
Wife: 'Did I say lilac? - I meant lavender'
Me: 'There's no lavender in the back or by the back door.'
Wife: 'Did I say back door? I meant front door. You should have known what I meant!
Me:
That conversation seems rather familiar
those conversations happen in our house too
ThinAir
Do more.
- Location
- Finchley, London.
At a party with some friends and meeting some new people, when during a conversation about Rik Mayall, the following phrase was uttered... "I was introduced to Bottom at a very young age", cue a huge amount of laughter...
SatNavSaysStraightOn
Changed hemispheres!
- Location
- ɐᴉlɐɹʇsn∀ 'ɐɹɹǝquɐƆ
She irons bras?A bit of background...
I weighed 10.5 stone most of my life, moderate ill health over the last 18 months has seen me mostly off the bike and putting on some, for the first time in my life, weight, I'm now 11.5 stone.
The wife is doing some ironing...
'Do you still wear this shirt ?'
'Oh yes, I like that one...although it might be a bit small now, some of my stuff is a bit tight now, look, I've even got a bit of man boobs'...as I cup my chest
Within a second or two, i turn round to see the wife offering me one of her bras off the ironing pile
gbb
Squire
- Location
- Peterborough
She irons bras?
I don't think so....but everything else, everything, does. 
vernon
Harder than Ronnie Pickering
- Location
- Meanwood, Leeds
She irons bras?
She's flat chested.....
SatNavSaysStraightOn
Changed hemispheres!
- Location
- ɐᴉlɐɹʇsn∀ 'ɐɹɹǝquɐƆ
I'm at my parent's home, watching my step-father in the motorhome. It's new this year and there are little things that need 'adjustment' and we are chatting away when I spot a bright pink torch of my mother's.
Me: Is that just a torch?
SF: Yes, why do you ask?
Me: Well its just the rubber case that it seems to have on it.
SF: Yes?
Me: Its pink, rubber and knobbly
SF: You have a dirty mind.
A few moments pass...
SF: I think your mother would say she would prefer something bigger
Me: Wouldn't all women?
SF:
A few more moments pass
SF: It does glow in the dark as well...
Me: <insert SF's name> That is really not helping this conversation you know
SF:
Me: Is that just a torch?
SF: Yes, why do you ask?
Me: Well its just the rubber case that it seems to have on it.
SF: Yes?
Me: Its pink, rubber and knobbly
SF: You have a dirty mind
.A few moments pass...
SF:
I think your mother would say she would prefer something biggerMe: Wouldn't all women?
SF:
A few more moments pass
SF: It does glow in the dark as well...
Me: <insert SF's name> That is really not helping this conversation you know
SF:
