Any good jokes ... ?

[PaulB]

Got my A level results:

Ocean geography 7 c s

Cosmetic surgery was double A now Double D

Television studies B B C

Horse feeding. A

Optical studies C

 

[Speicher]

Apiculture B

 

[Mr Celine]

Oh dear, your poor knowledge of football shows there. Firstly, that's Liam Brady and secondly, Arsenal never had a player called David Dicks. https://www.dnbstories.com/2018/03/arsenal-to-play-without-dicks-true-story.html

Graeme Souness once made a colossal error in taking JULIAN Dicks from West Ham but he was so awful, it seemed totally appropriate to sing 'Dicks out' whenever Souness was stupid enough to besmirch our team by actually putting him on the pitch.

I suspect that the joke has got as mangled as the football knowledge. It was probably supposed to be something like "get that dick off".

 

[Andy_R]

Apiculture B

Bee t me to it....

 

[Smokin Joe]

Oh dear, your poor knowledge of football shows there. Firstly, that's Liam Brady and secondly, Arsenal never had a player called David Dicks. https://www.dnbstories.com/2018/03/arsenal-to-play-without-dicks-true-story.html

Graeme Souness once made a colossal error in taking JULIAN Dicks from West Ham but he was so awful, it seemed totally appropriate to sing 'Dicks out' whenever Souness was stupid enough to besmirch our team by actually putting him on the pitch.

My bad.

But I only copied the feckin' thing.

 

[glasgowcyclist]

To the swine who stole my trainers and my hi-vis vest...

You can run but you can't hide.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

Maybe David Dicks changed his name to Eunuch Showunmi?

We know a song about him, don't we children?

Spoiler: NSFW - Sweary Words

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-awv67lBR8

 

[Cavalol]

Freud - Austrian neurologist, or how an Irishman likes his eggs?

 

[CharlesF]

 

[Arjimlad]

Apiculture B

Car Mechanics Double A

 

[Arjimlad]

 

[Cavalol]

Just confessed to a mate that I’m a big fan of Beyoncé.

He said “Whatever floats your boat”.

I said “No, that’s Buoyancy”.

 

[morrisman]

What do you call a man with no shins?
Tony

 

[Dirk]

I had a dream that the oceans had turned orange, but it was just a Fantasea......

 

[Llankey43]

Just read a book called Parachuting For Beginners by Hugo First