Any good jokes ... ?

[Cavalol]

I just found out that “Aaarghh” is not a real word.

I can’t express how angry that makes me.

 

[Cavalol]

 

[Cavalol]

I'm not saying the VW Golf car I had when I was younger was the most unreliable of cars, but the last six pages of the handbook contained the local bus and train timetables.

 

[alicat]

I have just stumbled across this thread and it has made me laugh. Thank you. Here is a true offering:

Me (at railway station in Staffs): I'd like to renew my season ticket please.

Scottish ticket office chappie: Tamworth?

Me: No, Five Ways.

Eddie in ticket office (hails from Scotland): Tamworth?

Me: No, Five Ways like I said last time.

[Repeat several times]

Eddie (getting exasperated): Do you want to renew it for a year?

Me:

 

[Cavalol]

My girlfriend woke up with a huge smile on her face this morning.

I love felt tips.

 

[Cavalol]

Should Mark Knopfler ever need an agent in the middle East, check out Qatar George, he knows all the Kurds.

 

[Cavalol]

My wife thinks our love life has got boring and I’m easily distracted....


...oh well, better get back to it I suppose.

 

[Dave7]

I’m not saying my Volkswagen Golf is unreliable, but the last six pages of the handbook are local bus and train timetables.

Now copying someone elses jokes is one thing but when you copy the one you posted this morning.....

 

[Cavalol]

Hahaha what an idiot I am, I even looked to see if I’d posted it

Time to reach for the delete button

 

[Dayvo]

Sorry, but I couldn't find it smaller.

 

[betty swollocks]

 

[Cavalol]

It's a little known fact that A.A. Milne the writer of 'Winnie the Pooh' had a smaller brother called A.A.A. Milne

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

The first thing I look for in a woman is intelligence




because if she doesn't have that I might have a chance.

 

[Cavalol]

 

[Cavalol]

Elton John thinks "Sorry" seems to be the hardest word.
He clearly hasn’t been to Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch