Any good jokes ... ?

[PaulSB]

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?


They're really good at it.

Why do elephants paint their toe nails red?



So they can hide in cherry trees.

 

[Cubist]

Why do elephants paint their toe nails red?



So they can hide in cherry trees.

What's the loudest noise in the jungle?

Giraffes eating cherries.

 

[subaqua]

To find out your Met Police commissioner name take the first name of your favourite Shakespeare character and the name your favourite carry on film .

There are a few crackers .....

 

[threebikesmcginty]

To find out your Met Police commissioner name take the first name of your favourite Shakespeare character and the name your favourite carry on film .

Porter Convenience

 

[wheresthetorch]

To find out your Met Police commissioner name take the first name of your favourite Shakespeare character and the name your favourite carry on film .

There are a few crackers .....

Bottom Nurse.

 

[rich p]

Gone(ril) Camping

 

[Arjimlad]

Macduff Khyber ? !

 

[NorthernDave]

Antigonus up the Khyber

 

[Markymark]

Romeo NoneOfThem

 

[theclaud]

Caliban up the Khyber

 

[Cubist]

Pease-Blossom Follow That Camel

 

[Bimble]

Shylock Doctor

 

[PaulB]

Passenger taps his taxi driver on the shoulder near his turn off to his house

The driver jumps out of his seat in shock, swerves, nearly hits a bus and stops inches from a shop window.

"Bloody hell, you're a bit jumpy aren't you? I only tapped your shoulder."

"Sorry," says the cabbie, "it's my first day. I've been driving a hearse for the last 20 years."

 

[morrisman]

Went to the doctors - he said "You've got four minutes to live"
I said "Isn't there anything you can give me?"
He said "A boiled egg?"

 

[Paulus]

An Irish spud farmer has three daughters to marry off.
The first daughter marries a king Edward and the father is delighted.
The second marries a Jersey Royal and the father is delighted.
The third marries a dic tater and the father is not happy.