roadrash
cycle chatterer
- Location
- sitting on the edge of wigan pier
Q.....whats black and white on the bottom and brown on top
A.. a nun with a monk on
A.. a nun with a monk on
Any good jokes ... ?
- Thread starter cisamcgu
- Start date
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stuee147
Senior Member
- Location
- north ayrshire
Close the thread. We have reached rock bottom.
oh no they get worse lol
what do you call Frankensteins wife ????
mrs Frankenstein
AndyRM
XOXO
- Location
- North Shields
roadrash
cycle chatterer
- Location
- sitting on the edge of wigan pier
not a joke but still funny, this really did happen.
after leaving school and starting her first job , my daughter came home on her first payday absolutely disgusted by the fact that she had to pay tax and insurance, and she doesnt even own a car .
she really isnt the sharpest knife in the box.
after leaving school and starting her first job , my daughter came home on her first payday absolutely disgusted by the fact that she had to pay tax and insurance, and she doesnt even own a car .
she really isnt the sharpest knife in the box.
glenn forger
Guest
William Shatner to duet with Stevie Nicks?
Maverick Goose
A jumped up pantry boy, who never knew his place
- Location
- A champagne supernova in the sky
Saw a sticker on a wall outside Euston today...''illegal immigration started with Columbus''.
threebikesmcginty
Corn Fed Hick...
- Location
- ...on the slake
In the Natural History museum a visitor asks one of the attendants how old a particular dinosaur is, the attendant says "it's 70,000,004 years and 3 months old", the visitor asks how they can be so accurate, the attendant replies "well, I've worked here for 4 years and 3 months and it was 70 million years old when I started".
vernon
Harder than Ronnie Pickering
- Location
- Meanwood, Leeds
Charlie was installing a new door and found that one of the hinges was missing.
He asked his wife Mary if she would go to WICKES DIY Store and pick up a hinge.
Mary agreed to go.
While she was waiting for the manager to finish serving a customer, her eye caught a beautiful bathroom Tap.
When the manager was finished, Mary asked him, "How much is that Bath Tap?"
The manager replied, "That's a gold plated Bath Tap and the price is £450.00.
Mary exclaimed, "My goodness, that is a very expensive Tap. It's certainly out of my price bracket."
She then proceeded to describe the hinge that Charlie had sent her to buy.
The manager said that he had them in stock and went into the storeroom to get one.
From the storeroom the manager yelled. "Ma'am, do you wanna screw for the hinge?"
Mary paused for a moment and then shouted back, "No, but I will for the Bath Tap”.
This is why you can't send a woman to WICKES DIY Store!
He asked his wife Mary if she would go to WICKES DIY Store and pick up a hinge.
Mary agreed to go.
While she was waiting for the manager to finish serving a customer, her eye caught a beautiful bathroom Tap.
When the manager was finished, Mary asked him, "How much is that Bath Tap?"
The manager replied, "That's a gold plated Bath Tap and the price is £450.00.
Mary exclaimed, "My goodness, that is a very expensive Tap. It's certainly out of my price bracket."
She then proceeded to describe the hinge that Charlie had sent her to buy.
The manager said that he had them in stock and went into the storeroom to get one.
From the storeroom the manager yelled. "Ma'am, do you wanna screw for the hinge?"
Mary paused for a moment and then shouted back, "No, but I will for the Bath Tap”.
This is why you can't send a woman to WICKES DIY Store!
Joey Shabadoo
My pronouns are "He", "Him" and "buggerlugs"
Just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome. The first couple of chapters were hard going but by the end, I loved it.
vernon
Harder than Ronnie Pickering
- Location
- Meanwood, Leeds
MALE LOGIC----FLAWLESS: Critical Thinking At Its Best!
Woman: Do you drink beer?
Man: Yes
Woman: How many beers a day?
Man: Usually about three
Woman: How much do you pay per beer?
Man: £3.00
Woman:And how long have you been drinking?
Man:About 20 years, I suppose
Woman: So a beer costs £3 and you have 3 beers a day which puts your spending each month at £270. In one year, it would be approximately £ 3240…correct?
Man:Correct
Woman: If in one year you spend £3240, not accounting for inflation, the past twenty years puts your spending at £64,800.... correct?
Man: Correct
Woman: Do you know that if you didn't drink so much beer, that money could have been put in a compound interest interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 20 years, you could have now bought a really good Porsche?
Man: Do you drink beer?
Woman: No
Man: Where's your Porsche?
Woman: Do you drink beer?
Man: Yes
Woman: How many beers a day?
Man: Usually about three
Woman: How much do you pay per beer?
Man: £3.00
Woman:And how long have you been drinking?
Man:About 20 years, I suppose
Woman: So a beer costs £3 and you have 3 beers a day which puts your spending each month at £270. In one year, it would be approximately £ 3240…correct?
Man:Correct
Woman: If in one year you spend £3240, not accounting for inflation, the past twenty years puts your spending at £64,800.... correct?
Man: Correct
Woman: Do you know that if you didn't drink so much beer, that money could have been put in a compound interest interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 20 years, you could have now bought a really good Porsche?
Man: Do you drink beer?
Woman: No
Man: Where's your Porsche?
