Dogtrousers
Kilometre nibbler
Chris Rea called Ian Botham a "gargantuan pie-eating nobhead" when he heard that he had lost out to Botham in his bid to appear in the Revitive adverts.
True Facts About Chris Rea
- Thread starter Drago
- Start date
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DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/videos/czdlgm2dq74o
Chris Rea has appeared over Hawaii in the Turdis, he went to see Elvis filming Blue Hawaii in 1961, as he was hoping to appear as an extra in a few scenes, however his return to the Teeesport Time Travel Megabase went wrong and the Turdis appeared over modern day Hawaii, where a huge Auberge field explosion caused the weather disruption described above, the Pineapple Express will be the second disaster he’s inflicted on California, as his recent appearance there, along with an Auberge field explosion set fire to a forest, hopefully the rain will damp down the fires
Chris Rea has appeared over Hawaii in the Turdis, he went to see Elvis filming Blue Hawaii in 1961, as he was hoping to appear as an extra in a few scenes, however his return to the Teeesport Time Travel Megabase went wrong and the Turdis appeared over modern day Hawaii, where a huge Auberge field explosion caused the weather disruption described above, the Pineapple Express will be the second disaster he’s inflicted on California, as his recent appearance there, along with an Auberge field explosion set fire to a forest, hopefully the rain will damp down the fires
Grant Fondo
Guru
- Location
- Cheshire
Chris Rea and Phil Collins haven't spoken since 1975 due to the fact Phil's brother, Lewis replaced Chris during rehersals for The Cuckoo Waltz.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Lewis Collins once mistook Chri Rea for a terrorist, prompting the famous TV hard man to leap across the bonnet of his Capri and karate chop Rea in the throat. This is how Rea cam by his distinctive gravelly tones.
grldtnr
Über Member
He might be right, he will only find out when he meets Ian .
grldtnr
Über Member
Chris tried ' buttering ' his crumpets with ' I can't believe it's not butter'
He didn't think so either, that's believe it's not butter.
' I prefer Stork SB ' he said as bunged another pr of crumpets into the Auberge field powered toaster, and topped them with cheese & marmite
He didn't think so either, that's believe it's not butter.
' I prefer Stork SB ' he said as bunged another pr of crumpets into the Auberge field powered toaster, and topped them with cheese & marmite
Dogtrousers
Kilometre nibbler
That was when he penned the song "Fool if you think it's Clover" wasn't it?
grldtnr
Über Member
Yes that's true,and still does ,after all these years!
He has run-through the whole gamut of fake dairy spreads, which is why they have those foil tops on the packs, so that you can't see his foot prints in the packs, but he still thinks Stork SB , is the best
He even got Leslie Crowthers tacit approval to say Ye to Stork SB!
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OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea has penned a new theme song on behalf of the Port of Liverpool tourist board.
Fool if You Think it's Dover was well received by board's directors.
Fool if You Think it's Dover was well received by board's directors.
DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
View: https://youtu.be/E9pW6PwEayQ?si=nOBA6CIqsI2jOo7r
Chris Rea hated "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" so much, he commissioned a lady to choreograph a dance routine in a pile of the stuff, to show his complete disdain for the vile product
Dogtrousers
Kilometre nibbler
Chris Rea's beard is always aligned with rising sun on the day of the vernal equinox.
lazybloke
Ginger biscuits and cheddar
- Location
- Leafy Surrey
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea founded the druids in 435BC, hence the beards, mournful wailing, and all pervading whiff of incense.
DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
Chris Rea is also responsible for the Wailing Wall, or Western Wall in Jerusalem, where many people pray and rock backwards and forwards, this is due to The Appearance of the Turdis, and it’s megawatt sound system with “Driving Home For Xmas” on a never ending loop, the locals were driven mad by the constant playing of the song, and thus the practice of praying & rocking started, many prayers are written down and placed in cracks in the wall, lots of which ask for Chris Rea to never return, under any circumstances
