True Facts About Chris Rea

[Drago]

Chris Rea ate Freddie Starr's hamster.

 

[Grant Fondo]

* I made the last one up if Chris Rea's legal council ever read this. But all the rest are true.

 

[Grant Fondo]

* actually the post about Chris playing with Black Sabbath was inaccurate, he also played glockenspiel on Master of Reality, sorry.

 

[Gwylan]

Chris Rea is allergic to the colour puce.

So are most normal people

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea dreamed of the chemical formula for a successful cancer cure. Unfortunately, when he awoke he couldn't remember what it was.

 

[lazybloke]

One of the trial events at Paris is the sport of Human Dressage.

With enough use of the whip, Chris Rea can achieve an astonishing quality of "trotting backwards", sometimes on the diagonal.

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea is in demand on TV in America.

His goatee beard and English accent make him a very popular murderous villain in shows such as Columbo, TJ Hooker, and Friends.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Chris Rea is a barista at the Grand Hotel, Scarborough on the third Sunday of each month.

 

[Dogtrousers]

The reason Chris Rea has never toured the United States despite having a very active fanclub there and he is afraid of what he refers to as "predatory ladies". As evidence he produces a bundle of papers. "You should see the letters they send" he says, wide-eyed. "They're really rude"

 

[Gwylan]

The reason Chris Rea has never toured the United States despite having a very active fanclub there and he is afraid of what he refers to as "predatory ladies". As evidence he produces a bundle of papers. "You should see the letters they send" he says, wide-eyed. "They're really rude"

Some stars might find having lady fans who can write would be a bit of a challenge

 

[Toshiba Boy]

Chris Rea's secret proudest musical accomplishment is writing Ernie for Benny Hill.

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea is the son of Roy and Hayley from Corrie.

 

[PeteXXX]

Chris Rea smells of TCP

 

[Gwylan]

Chris Rea's secret proudest musical accomplishment is writing Ernie for Benny Hill.

Sorry, that's needs a correction. Benny Hill wrote it but he never credited Chris with the orchestration.
After Chris's work the horse was altogether better natured

 

[Toshiba Boy]

Sorry, that's needs a correction. Benny Hill wrote it but he never credited Chris with the orchestration.
After Chris's work the horse was altogether better natured

That's pedantically correct, although to be even more pedantic, Chris Rea did come up with the name Two-Ton Ted from Teddington, based on large gentleman he used to buy his buns from.