True Facts About Chris Rea

[Grant Fondo]

Although Chris Rea is worth a respectable $8million, it is dwarfed by the worlds richest musician, Billy Ocean at $7.5billion.

 

[Drago]

Billy Ocean has let himself go of late and now physically dwarfs the trim and toned Chris Rea.

 

[Dogtrousers]

Chris Rea prides himself on his ability to recite the first four digits of the decimal expansion of pi

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Chris Rea is a grandmaster chess player and once beat Gary Kasparov in a game of speed chess.

 

[lazybloke]

Chris Rea was invited to appear on Children's Television after he saved the school gerbils from a classroom fire.

Valerie Singleton awarded him the coveted Gold Blue Peter Badge, but it was confiscated after he pinched her bum and lit up his totaliser.

 

[Paulus]

Chris Rea once rode from Middlesbrough to John O'Groats on a Raleigh 20 Shopper bike.
It unfortunately got pinched in Newcastle on the return trip.

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea is to appear as the celebrity guest in the next Warburton's tv advert.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Chris Rea dislikes Yorkshire Tea. He is quoted as saying “Drunk by southerners and tastes of piss“

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea shares 98% of his DNA with the knitted PG Tips monkey.

 

[Wixsteman]

Chris Rea can hit 180 with 1 dart

 

[Dogtrousers]

Chris Rea shares 98% of his DNA with the knitted PG Tips monkey.

Well that's not saying much seeing that it can be proved that everyone in the world is related to the PG tips monkey if you trace back all family trees by at least 23 years.

 

[Wixsteman]

Chris Rea can fix the internet

 

[lazybloke]

Chris Rea can fix the internet

Surely today's internet woes are entirely caused by the viral phenomenon and massive subsequent traffic of billions flocking to read "True Facts About Chris Rea" ?
Shaun recently upgraded the servers with a spare Pentium found under his bed, so there's plenty of capacity for us here in the UK to view the site and add to this thread, but all the international demand has overloaded the undersea data links and cut off the UK from the rest of the web. Chris Rea has effectively killed the internet.

If you can hear wailing it's because @Drago discovered his favourite website "AliceHotProfRoberts.dig " is hosted overseas.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Chris Rea holds the world record for the most pints drunk whilst on a pogo stick.

 

[rogerzilla]

Chris Rea knows the secret Brown Note that causes everyone who hears it to involuntarily shart. The US DoD have offered him billions for it but he says he's keeping it to himself in case he's ever asked to support Coldplay.