True Facts About Chris Rea

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Ming the Merciless

There is no mercy
Location
Inside my skull
You pronounce Chris Rea as Chas Hodges. Many get it wrong.
 
OP
OP
Drago

Drago

Legendary Member
Chris Rea is a keen historical practical joker. It was Rea that drove the Time Transit around the Colosseum, thus leaving tyre marks in the sand and confounding archaeologists.
 

stephec

Squire
Location
Bolton
In every ancient history film where there's a claim of contrails in the background Chris Rea has strangely been unable to account for his whereabouts at the time.
 

lazybloke

Priest of the cult of Chris Rea
Location
Leafy Surrey
For once, Chris Rea's TURDIS wasn't the cause of the chaos
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grldtnr

Ãœber Member
Chris Rea is also a secret Santa cross dresser, he has a wonderful Christmas time Mrs. Santa outfit , but for some reason he wears the bra & panties the wrong way round?
( He really ought to shave his legs tho'!)
 

DRM

Guru
Location
West Yorks
Chris Rea was once left at home, alone as child, as the rest of his family went to visit relatives, using all his ingenuity he set up various booby traps to thwart 2 local scallywags, and ne’er do wells from breaking in to the house, he made the mistake of telling someone in the U.S about it many years later, who wrote a script and made a block buster film starring Macaulay Culkin in the part of the young Chris Rea
 

DRM

Guru
Location
West Yorks
Every year, on December 24th, NORAD display their radar on their website,showing santa‘s sleigh on it’s delivery round, unfortunately they keep locking on to the Time Transit, driving home for Christmas, for many decades now the U.S intelligence agencies have been trying to cover up the fact that they believed Santa’s workshop was in Teesport, not the North Pole, the documents are locked away in the Pentagon, and they still believe Santa works out of Teesside
 

lazybloke

Priest of the cult of Chris Rea
Location
Leafy Surrey
Chris Rea was once left at home, alone as child, as the rest of his family went to visit relatives, using all his ingenuity he set up various booby traps to thwart 2 local scallywags, and ne’er do wells from breaking in to the house, he made the mistake of telling someone in the U.S about it many years later, who wrote a script and made a block buster film starring Macaulay Culkin in the part of the young Chris Rea

OMG, that also explains MacGyver!

His singing and song-writing abilities seem to be significantly eclipsed by his scientific inventiveness and problem-solving prowess. One wonders what his next achievement will be.
 
Location
Cheshire
Chris has received an early Christmas present this year! He managed to get a small gash in his front left winter tyre repaired for £30 prior to his upcoming trip. A new tyre would have set him back £185.
 
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