Give me some dialogue from your day

[Cubist]

Sunday. Sitting in a restaurant - there is a man wearing hunting/camouflage clothing that we notice hasn't been served yet.

Friend of ours: "How come buddy over there in the camouflage hasn't been served yet?"

Dad, quick as ever. "Cause nobody's seen him!"

We were driving home from a rugby match and drove past a pub forecourt, where there was a huge bloke on a big Transalp style bike, dressed head to toe in snow cammo riding gear.
Me "What the hell has he come as?"
Cubester "Who?"
Me "The bloke in the ......Ah bollocks! Yeah, you got me!"
Cubester "Yessssssss! I beat you at a Dad joke!"

 

[jhawk]

It's 9AM. I've woken up an hour ago to see that the dog has pee'd in my room.

Glorious.

Then, I hear Dad singing The Fray's, "How To Save A Life"...

"Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend somewhere along in the bitterness..."

Me: "Maybe it's because you wouldn't stop f*cking singing!"

 

[gbb]

I am sat in the workshop, I cock my ear......heavy piston engined aircraft overhead, I jump up and head to the door.
My colleague, already outside the door..
'Hey Col, look at this !!!'
'Wah, its a Flying Fortress...first one i've ever seen'

Right over the top of us, headed from (i'd imagine) Lakenheath or Mildenhall over Chatteris toward Spalding or Stamford way, at about 500 ft perhaps. Clear as a bell, you could see the front facing turret on the underbelly...lovely sound, nice to see something ive never seen.

 

[Lullabelle]

Earlier on today we were in New Look and I bought a pair of shoes that had been price reduced from £29.99 to £15.00. They were put through the till

Sales girl: oh £12.00, there you go more off
Me: oh great

 

[surfdude]

i got a key safe for when we go surfing .
the wife asked where do we put it .
i said we chain it to the wheel of the car
she said will that not be noisy when we are driving along.
no dear we take it off after we have been surfing and put it in the car . we don't leave it chained to the wheel all the time

 

[Crackle]

Son2: where shall I put this cucumber
Me: Get a manikin out the drawer and put it in that
Son2: A manikin dad. Where shall I get that. From the underwear shop down the road?
Me: Eh? Oh. A ramekin not a manikin.
Me: What do you know about the bra shop then?

 

[BigonaBianchi]

no dialogue..just wham bam whiz bash crak thump zap bang ....went to see X men

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Son2: where shall I put this cucumber?

That is too delicious a question to ignore!!

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Has watched the x men film in 3 D I think the goodies won but not sure who the goodies were...but I do now own a pair of uber kool 3 D glasses

They were Tim Brooke Taylor, Bill Oddie and Graham Garden!!




I'll get me coat!

 

[Maverick Goose]

That is too delicious a question to ignore!!

@stephec , where are you in our hour of need? Are you all worn out?....

 

[Crackle]

That is too delicious a question to ignore!!

It was chopped up and if it was you asking, you'd have received a different answer

 

[KneesUp]

Daughter (4) is on half term, and has evidently found OH's phone and activated Siri

I have the following texts:

"We are coming through we are coming true today Yerevan teen bad time"

"They fathered their bum bum bum 1118 grandad to Thea's"

"Love you dad"

 

[Cheddar George]

They were Tim Brooke Taylor, Bill Oddie and Graham Garden!!




I'll get me coat!

Ok, not recent but relevant.
Myself and a work colleague.

Me: "I just heard on the radio that Graham Greene has died, shame , I'm a big fan of his."

C: "Oh, me too, he was one of the Goodies wasn't he ?"

 

[SatNavSaysStraightOn]

not quite a dialogue in the verbal sense...

OH email subject line: Do we need more bleach?
Me: & on CC
Me reading email subject: Do we need more bikes?
Me replies: Of course we always need an n+1 (hits send)
Me thinking: Why the dickens is he asking me if we need more bikes.
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me replying: Ignore last email. No bleach required! (hits send)
Me replying 3rd time: I read that as do we need more bikes? I had to double take, I could not for the life of me see why you would be asking me that! (hits send)
Me:
Me replying for 4th time: Cancelled parents... going back to bed. Falling asleep at the table! (hits send)
OH ringing me: Go back to bed...

Don't think today is happening!

 

[Ganymede]

Mr G was in a rowboat today with our 2 grandsons, aged nearly 5 and nearly 7. Note: Mr G and I lived in Australia for a couple of years in the 80s.

Mr G: *teaches them the sea shanty "And We're Bound for South Australiaaaa..."*
Boys: *singing along*
....time passes...
1st grandson: Oh, I wish I could go to Australia.
Mr G: But you can - when you are older you can go wherever you like.
1st grandson (sadly): But you said we're Banned from South Australia.