Give me some dialogue from your day

[Ganymede]

The moon was very beautiful tonight. I paraphrased a well-known ditty:

Me (bursting into song): When.... tha.... Moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie
SO: (joining in the tune): ... it's annoying....

I laughed so hard I nearly had to stop the car...

 

[Puddles]

Fed Ex Man: Here you are parcel for you

Me: *Peers at label on small box* thats not mine I didn't order that

Fed-Ex: how can you tell?

Me: It is from the bike shop I ordered a Wee Hoo that box is far too small unless it is inflatable

Fed-Ex Well you signed for it so here you go

15 minutes later..............

Fed-Ex: I missed this large parcel for you

Me: Yes that is a wee hoo, now I shall have to phone the shop and tell them I have received it as well as the other parcel that is not mine

Fed-EX The other one was not yours at all

Me: Nope, called the shop they are getting it collected by Fed Ex

Fed-Ex: I shall see you tomorrow then

Me: Can you not take it now

Fed-Ex: No I need the paper work

Tsk & Pfft!

 

[jhawk]

I received an e-mail today!

"Hi Jack, just wanted to let you know that your articles that you've submitted to me will be published! I'm unsure as to which monthly edition they'll appear in. So, I'll contact you in January."

I just about jumped out of my seat! Published, baby!

 

[Spinney]

I received an e-mail today!

"Hi Jack, just wanted to let you know that your articles that you've submitted to me will be published! I'm unsure as to which monthly edition they'll appear in. So, I'll contact you in January."

I just about jumped out of my seat! Published, baby!

What's being published? We need to know....!
(and )

 

[jhawk]

What's being published? We need to know....!
(and )

Articles! I wrote a couple about my first two day-trips out on the new bike. You can view them here once they're published.

 

[jhawk]

"What do you want for Christmas then, Dad?"
"I don't know. Surprise me!"

He expects me to surprise him. Me - who by his own admission, "Couldn't find his arse with both hands a map in a well-lit room." This'll be interesting.

 

[Lullabelle]

From a few months ago at work

Delivery guy: parcel, sign here love (wipes snotty nose on back of his hand)
Me: that is not ours
Delivery guy: you're joking ain't ya
Me: no, the name on here is not our company name
Delivery guy: well I don't know do I (pulled an offensive face)
Me: there is a huge sign above the front door and it is completely different
Deliver guy: oh f*****g hell ( stomped out muttering)
Me: not my fault you can't read

 

[Octet]

From a few months ago at work

Delivery guy: parcel, sign here love (wipes snotty nose on back of his hand)
Me: that is not ours
Delivery guy: you're joking ain't ya
Me: no, the name on here is not our company name
Delivery guy: well I don't know do I (pulled an offensive face)
Me: there is a huge sign above the front door and it is completely different
Deliver guy: oh f*****g hell ( stomped out muttering)
Me: not my fault you can't read

But the GPS told me, so it must be the right place!

 

[Lullabelle]

But the GPS told me, so it must be the right place!

Stupid GPS, even more stupid is the guy who can't tell the difference between a company with 2 words in it's name and ours which has 9

 

[annedonnelly]

Stupid GPS, even more stupid is the guy who can't tell the difference between a company with 2 words in it's name and ours which has 9

There are sadly a surprising number of people who can't read, but manage to hide that fact. Unlikely that they'd get a job as a delivery driver but stranger things have happened...

 

[vernon]

There are sadly a surprising number of people who can't read, but manage to hide that fact. Unlikely that they'd get a job as a delivery driver but stranger things have happened...

Illiteracy permeates a wide range of occupations and I'm not surprised by the inability to match goods with the destination. Illiterate workers use a whole range of strategies to cope e.g. have you ever been stopped by a van driver and asked where a destination is and the driver points to the name of the company or the street? That's one of the coping strategies in action.

It works too. I've used the aforementioned technique in Hungary where I am functionally illiterate in Hungarian.

 

[Lullabelle]

Illiteracy permeates a wide range of occupations and I'm not surprised by the inability to match goods with the destination. Illiterate workers use a whole range of strategies to cope e.g. have you ever been stopped by a van driver and asked where a destination is and the driver points to the name of the company or the street? That's one of the coping strategies in action.

It works too. I've used the aforementioned technique in Hungary where I am functionally illiterate in Hungarian.

That is no excuse for being rude

 

[gbb]

My young colleague has just slashed out on a diesel Golf, nice car, i'd be happy with it myself.
We're stood outside the workshop, surveying everyones filthy cars ( mine excluded, its clean) and he says...
'I'm gonna wash it later, be nice to have a car I can feel proud of'

I relied...
'It will wont it...one day you will..one day you'll get that car Dave'

Dave... i asked for that'

 

[jhawk]

"You're not very photogenic, are you?"
"I'M STILL GETTING USED TO IT OKAY?!"

She's a one...

 

[jhawk]

"Hi!" I said, catching up to my Dad as he'd left for the shops before me.
"Oh, I heard you coming - it was like a herd of baby elephants coming up behind me."