Give me some dialogue from your day

[GrasB]

Me: In section 8 of the job description it clearly states "responsible for the disposal of all waste refuse & recycling"
HR person: The cleaners don't have any time to deal with boxes from computer deliveries
Me: Nether do the COs, we're too busy doing our jobs.
HR person: But they're really busy & things will get left.
Me: So you're saying that grade 6, 7 & 9 COs job take lower priority than a grade 2 cleaners?
HR person: No, just they've not got any time left!
Me: Fine, shall we ask the director if he'd prefer all the corridors not to be hovered today or if we've not got the new Post Doc PCs installed by Monday?
HR Person: ... Oh, then the cleaners will be disposing of the computer packaging! *HR person leaves the room*
*pause*
Another CO: busy doing what? chatting on to students? I've had to empty our bin 3 weeks in a row FFS!
Me: Tell me about it. Actually I have got the time to do it, it's just the damn principle of it & why I refused to back down on this one.
Another CO:

We've had an on-going issue that since the 2 full time cleaners retired that the standard of cleaning in the department has gone through the floor. Offices not being hovered, bins & recycle bins being emptied once a week at best, the kitchens not being cleaned for several days. The new cleaners keep on saying that they're too busy but everyone notices they seem to spend a lot of time talking to the PhD students.

 

[Arch]

me: You hold it, I can't keep it in and suck at the same time....

(we were siphoning water out of the overflowing tank at work...)

 

[gbb]

I start my sons scooter, having just replqced the spark plug, which had come loose..'There you go ...'
'Thanks dad, I told my mate you'd be able to sort it'
'Ah, no problem, lucky it was something simple'
'My mate thought it was a job for the garage, it sounded horrible, all noisy and rough'
'Thats the thing, its easy to imagine the worst, like oh christ, the engine's cream crackered...but it's usually something simple'
'Cheers again dad...'

 

[Archie_tect]

Me "Where do they live?"

Mrs 3BM "The thingy next to the whatsit, you know"

Me "could you be slightly more specific?"

... all these years married and you still can't tell a thingie from a wotsit?

 

[gbb]

... all these years married and you still can't tell a thingie from a wotsit?

My wife sat there one day and responded to a subject we'd been talking about, and said something along the lines of...
'Oh yeah, that reminds me, someone said something like that, I cant remember who it was and I cant remember what it was she said, but it was something like that '

My son looked at me ...I looked at my son......I looked at the wife..... 'You said a whole lot there...and told us nothing'

 

[colly]

Shopping earlier.
Mrs: Your fly is undone.
Me: Oh yes, never mind. dead birds don't fall out of nests.
Lady behind the counter: Blink, blink, blush, blush.

 

[Lanzecki]

So, you took a phone call from some guy. Sounded Indian you say? From your PC's manufacturer saying there was a fault and they wanted to fix it. But when he asked you what operating system is was, you didn't start thinking? How about when you told him is wasn't connected to the internet? You didn't wonder how he know about you PC then?

 

[gbb]

'Phil, have you got the number for the roofing contractors, they've left their mobiles behind' I asked...
He replied..
'I have' as he started to fish about getting his phone out..
'Can you ring them and let them know they've left their phones behind.....'
And then it dawned on me...so I immediately continued..
'Not much point though eh, seeing as I have their phones ?..i cant believe i just said that !!'

 

[ufkacbln]

Walking through the Hospital, and came to a junction where an elderly couple are looking lost.

Cheerfully I asked "Can I help - you look lost?"

He replies "We aren't lost, we just don't know where we are going!"

 

[Arch]

'Phil, have you got the number for the roofing contractors, they've left their mobiles behind' I asked...
He replied..
'I have' as he started to fish about getting his phone out..
'Can you ring them and let them know they've left their phones behind.....'
And then it dawned on me...so I immediately continued..
'Not much point though eh, seeing as I have their phones ?..i cant believe i just said that !!'

NT has been having trouble getting his phone to connect to his laptop, and this weekend my laptop died completely. We were talking about how he couldn't tweet a photo off his phone because it wouldn't transfer to his laptop. "oh!" I said, "we could see if your phone will talk to my lapto... Oh. No."

 

[phil_hg_uk]

NT has been having trouble getting his phone to connect to his laptop, and this weekend my laptop died completely. We were talking about how he couldn't tweet a photo off his phone because it wouldn't transfer to his laptop. "oh!" I said, "we could see if your phone will talk to my lapto... Oh. No."

Install dropbox on the phone and his laptop and use that to transfer the photo.

 

[king dick]

My brother is in his 40s, nice enough chap if he's sober and his visit lasts no more than 10 minutes maximum.
The trouble with him is he repeats himself and is a self appointed judge and jury of all things past and present.
I over heard him tell my 4 year old twin girls today that they should ALWAYS ALWAYS wash their fruit!!! As quick as a flash Georgia replied
" yeah not bananas" then within a split second Becky chimed in with
"Yeah or oranges"
Pmsl if only I could have taken a picture of his expression

 

[Mattonsea]

My brother is in his 40s, nice enough chap if he's sober and his visit lasts no more than 10 minutes maximum.
The trouble with him is he repeats himself and is a self appointed judge and jury of all things past and present.
I over heard him tell my 4 year old twin girls today that they should ALWAYS ALWAYS wash their fruit!!! As quick as a flash Georgia replied
" yeah not bananas" then within a split second Becky chimed in with
"Yeah or oranges"
Pmsl if only I could have taken a picture of his expression

Clever Kids!!

 

[king dick]

Clever Kids!!

Thank you

 

[king dick]

Last year on that one day we all probably remember when the rain stopped and the sun came out.Georgia and I were down the beach Gazing up into the deep blue sky when along came a floater...No not a solid brown floater from the sewage plant along the coast. It was a pure white dumpy cloud, always one to try and further her knowledge and encourage her already enquisative nature I asked if it could fall on us ?
No Dad she replied
" Its stuck on the blue"