Give me some dialogue from your day

[threebikesmcginty]

Me (to Master 3BM): How many questions a day do you think you ask?

Master 3BM: What's that number called, the one that never ends?

Groan...

 

[gbb]

Me to the Val, a shop floor supervisor...
'Oh fer chrissakes Val, are they thick or something, tneyve used a can of(aerosol) oil instead of silicone on the infeed of the machine' (silicone helps the infeed flow smoothly...oil definately wont)
'Its just a can to them Colin, they dont know whats in it'...she replied symathetically, shaking her head in disbelief.
'Working on that principle then, they'll be using domestos instead of shaving cream in the bathroom..just because its in the same cupboard... '

Raucous laughter followed
'Bloody stupid, health and safety means nothing to some of these people, honest to god.'

 

[Hover Fly]

At work today, Moon Bunny espied a flock of mixed Canada and Greylag geese. She stood on a small hill and started to address them, "My brethren, you are welcome to our band, be prepared to throw our oppressors into the sea... (Irish waffle, you know the sort of thing)...so be with us or be forever ashamed to be so weak and feeble," at this point a large Canada gander got fed up with her.
Gander: HONK HONK, (adopts threat posture) HONK (charges straight at Bunny)
Bunny "Oh****! (turns and runs, leaps a small wall with remarkable agility for a pregnant woman.)
Me, (helping Bunny to her feet) It's a Canada goose, Bunny, they're on our side.

 

[ColinJ]

"Nurse, I feel a bit faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ..."

(Thud!)

 

[Arch]

[QUOTE 2631850, member: 45"]Oooh dear. You OK now?[/quote]

Well, ok for Colin, you know, in a Normal For Norfolk way...

 

[ColinJ]

[QUOTE 2631850, member: 45"]Oooh dear. You OK now?[/quote]
Dazed, but okay!

I was too embarrassed to say that I was feeling squeamish and wobbly, and asking the nurse to recline the chair before taking blood ... The resulting faint was way more embarrassing than the request would ever have been!

Well, ok for Colin, you know, in a Normal For Norfolk way...

That's absolutely unf ...






... ortunately true!

 

[phil_hg_uk]

Dazed, but okay!

I was too embarrassed to say that I was feeling squeamish and wobbly, and asking the nurse to recline the chair before taking blood ... The resulting faint was way more embarrassing than the request would ever have been!

Never mind you wont have been the first and at least you didn't chuck up all over her

 

[ColinJ]

Never mind you wont have been the first and at least you didn't chuck up all over her

The thing that I am very grateful for is heeding the warning from my bladder as I entered the clinic! I was a couple of minutes late and briefly considered leaving having a pee until after my appointment. Good job I didn't or my embarrassment factor would probably have ended up multiplied by 10 ...

 

[Lanzecki]

oppressors into the sea... (Irish waffle, you know the sort of thing)...

Yes, Yes I do. I blame the Blarney stone.

I understand the effect does wear off.

 

[Headgardener]

I might add that the guide dog is nine years old and would probably have got retired at it's next annual health check, which acording to the owner would have been a couple of months away, anyway.

 

[Lanzecki]

At a customer today to 'support' an software provider that's managed to talk the customer into buying. Customer wants me there all day, wants to negotiate a stupidy low daily rate.

Remember I had nothing to do with the software, have never heard of it before and know nothing about it. I can only help with local knowledge.

Me: After the discussion going on. Negotiations finish at fresh Jam Donuts and Expresso from the fancy Deli down the road.

Software guy "What's the admin password, what which server has SQL?"

Me: "SQL? none of them"

Me Looking at the customer, "I think my work is done. Next time ask my advise before buying software. It's what I'm here for."

 

[Moon bunny]

[QUOTE 2631821, member: 45"]I fear for the child.[/quote]

It will be all right, both its parents come from long lines of eccentrics.

 

[theloafer]

been very stressful day here spent an hour with the undertaker sorting out dads funeral who knew there would be so much to do ...but now he is in a better place

 

[Arch]

been very stressful day here spent an hour with the undertaker sorting out dads funeral who knew there would be so much to do ...but now he is in a better place

Condolences. It's all a bit stressful, but it does pass. Sometimes, having all the sorting out to do is a good thing, it keeps you busy.

 

[Sandra6]

smallest daughter - Are you going to take me to see the One Direction film today?
me - I really don't think I can sit through it.
SD - You could have a little sleep.
(Fortunately for me the sun shone, her friend called, and both me and 1D were forgotten. Yay!)