Favourite Insults

[flake99please]

You have breath like an armpit with teeth.

 

[Dave7]

Every one has the right to be ugly but you have abused the privilege

 

[Bazzer]

He/she had a face like a slapped arse.

 

[Drago]

I wouldn't say your mum is fat, but Ive heard she wear a G rope.

 

[Richard A Thackeray]

I wouldn't say that you're fat, but you do make a beeping noise when you walk backwards.

 

[Smokin Joe]

I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?

 

[LeetleGreyCells]

"Don't give me that, you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings! Shut your festering gob, you tit! Your type makes me puke! You vacuous toffee-nosed malodorous pervert!!!"

 

[chriswoody]

Not wishing too fall foul of the swear filter I'll leave this here:

 

[Arrowfoot]

Do this with a smile "I heard you are into fast women and slow horses" It will take a few seconds before the realisation that it is not a compliment.

 

[Drago]

Of course, no one can lob an insult like the master, R. Lee Ermey, who ad libbed virtually all his own lines for the film...


View: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eJSUvCQGL6Q&has_verified=1


Definitely not safe for work - you will be sacked and possibly sent to prison if you watch this at work!

 

[glasgowcyclist]

He/she had a face like a slapped arse.

Our version of that is “a face like a well-skelped arse”.

 

[Mo1959]

We had a bit of a growler of a boss at work who we used to say looked like a Rottweiler chewing a wasp…….not to her face obviously!

 

[midlife]

Slinks off to look for my Rogers Profanosaurus (Viz).....

 

[irw]

Anyone from Liverpool will know that an argument is over when the response is 'Ya Ma....', often followed with whatever the other person has just said.

 

[Hacienda71]

You look like a bulldog chewing a wasp.