Childless or childfree?

[Cathryn]

It's kind of an ongoing thing.

Teenager - when are you going to get a boyfriend?
Twenties - when are you going to buy a house? When are you going to get married?
Thirties - when are you going to have a baby? Maybe that question twice...


People are generally just wanting the best, but it can be insensitive!!

 

[Speicher]

There's some sort of assumption that it's a perfectly acceptable thing to ask, and if you say no another assumption that you're in some way deficient or heartless. Looking on the bright side at least when I'm in my 40s people will stop asking if I'm going to have them!

One thing about not having children, is that without the years of sleepless nights, and having the time to keep fit, you might look younger than you are for a while. So people asking you about children will go on well into your forties. Then it might suddenly change to "have your children left home"?

I would emphasise that I have great respect for people with children and admire greatly the hard work, dedication and great responsibility that goes with it.

 

[Cathryn]

People will well behaved, balanced, lovely kids are phenomenal!! I agree, Speicher.

 

[rich p]

People will well behaved, balanced, lovely kids are phenomenal!! I agree, Speicher.

People like your Mum, Cathryn?

 

[Cathryn]

Exactly!!! Prime example.

 

[LLB]

One thing about not having children, is that without the years of sleepless nights, and having the time to keep fit, you might look younger than you are for a while. So people asking you about children will go on well into your forties. Then it might suddenly change to "have your children left home"?

I would emphasise that I have great respect for people with children and admire greatly the hard work, dedication and great responsibility that goes with it.

Kids = Agony & Ecstacy. Parenthood is as much a journey of discovery for a parent as growing up is for a kid, and if you take it seriously, it can be a massive responsibility/burden.

A few of my school mates never had kids and they look older than me. People are surprised I have an 18 year old daughter (who has flown the nest now). She is much more agro than a newborn.

 

[Dayvo]

People like your Mum, Cathryn?

Stop thinking 'Brazilian', richp!

 

[rich p]

Stop thinking 'Brazilian', richp!

I'm still in shock Dayvo

 

[Janeyb]

Yes, sometimes I'm tempted to do that as well!

Well actually.........I have hinted at that and it shut them up.

It's not entirely untrue either. Was due to have a laparoscopy a while back for suspected endometriosis which can lead to fertility issues. As it turned out, due to the fact that I have an irregular heart rhythm, just as I was about to go into surgery, the anaesthetist bottled out and said he wasn't prepared to risk the op! So....we decided not to proceed with any further investigations.

 

[Cathryn]

I'm still in shock Dayvo

Grrr..I said you should MEET my Mum!!!

 

[Cycling Naturalist]

It makes me cringe as for all they know I could have spent the last ten years desperately trying and failing to conceive (I haven't). QUOTE]

Exactly...for us it's annoying as we've not been trying either but imagine if we were years down and it was the biggest agony of my life!! I'm almost tempted to pretend we've been unsuccessful for years just to see their faces.

With prying women you might suggest that you think the problem is with your partner and ask the woman if she would mind her partner making a "donation."

 

[Dayvo]

Grrr..I said you should MEET my Mum!!!

Yes, rich p; MEET! With two 'E's!

 

[Rhythm Thief]

It's kind of an ongoing thing.

Teenager - when are you going to get a [girl]friend?
Twenties - when are you going to buy a house? When are you going to get married?
Thirties - when are you going to have a baby? Maybe that question twice...


People are generally just wanting the best, but it can be insensitive!!

I've only done one of those things, and I'm nearly 37.

 

[Dayvo]

I've only done one of those things, and I'm nearly 37.

Me too! The teenager one, and I'm 48!

 

[Kirstie]

Was desperate for kids when i got married but as my marriage nearly fell apart it's put me right off! Now eveyrthing is OK, either way is fine really, but I'm more on the side of no because I'd like my life to remain my own.