Any good jokes ... ?

[Pinno718]

My theory for why the USAians refer to maths as math is they needed to strip off the 's' to add it to Lego to get the incorrect plural of Legos

He's right you know.

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

It's the American name.

AKA - wrong

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

Foul or blatantly pornographic definitely doesn't. Anything overtly sexist, racist etc doesn't. Ditto political jokes. Keep 'em clean and you'll be ok.

Political ones have a place in "The Other Place" - link at the top of the page
it needs a separate registration and is unmoderated - I think
opinions can vary on there

 

[SpokeyDokey]

Political ones have a place in "The Other Place" - link at the top of the page
it needs a separate registration and is unmoderated - I think
opinions can vary on there

Yes, it is completely unmoderated - all we do over 'this side' is process the applications to join.

 

[Profpointy]

I asked my mother which European city does the best deer meat and she said.......


I'll let you fill in this yourselves because I lost the will to live before the punch line.

Took me longer than it should have done, but very good !

 

[roadrash]

My wife and I have decided we don't want kids
It was a hard decision but we've decided to tell them tonight

 

[roadrash]

 

[Seevio]

I asked my mother which European city does the best deer meat and she said.......


I'll let you fill in this yourselves because I lost the will to live before the punch line.

I too, have lost the will for you to live.

 

[LCpl Boiled Egg]

Hi. Refugee from Bikeradar forum here. Are rude jokes allowed on here then?

Foul or blatantly pornographic definitely doesn't. Anything overtly sexist, racist etc doesn't. Ditto political jokes. Keep 'em clean and you'll be ok.

Sexist jokes are absolutely fine, as are "Paddy and Mick" style racist ones. If the Mods disagree they've obviously not been reading this thread for a while.

For example:

My friend's sex change operation went so well yesterday that she's still trying to reverse out of the hospital car park.

and

Paddy says to Murphy "my friend came off his motorbike yesterday "
Really says Murphy.
Yep, says Paddy, he has brain damage, 2 broken arms, a broken leg and his eyesight is damaged.
Murphy says "bl**dy he'll, its no wonder he came off his bike".

 

[Richard A Thackeray]

I think my favourite Irish joke concerns the foreman recruiting at his building site. Keen to check that the guy knows his trade he asks a few questions "Tell me Seamus, what's the difference between a joist and a girder". "To be sure I know that; it was Goethe that wrote Faust and Joyce that wrote Ulysees"

(A cod Irish accent helps)

Co-incidentally, BBC4 rebroadcast a Dave Allen special, earlier this week (Monday, I think?) & that joke was told by the great man

 

[postman]

Mrs P deserves a weekend away.So i rang a hotel to book a romantic few days.A voice answered the phone,best western i replied High Noon then they cut me off.

 

[SteveO69]

 

[SteveO69]

My favourite Ken Dodd joke.

Liverpool is the most environmentally friendly city in Britain.

All the churches are unleaded.

 

[SpokeyDokey]

Sexist jokes are absolutely fine, as are "Paddy and Mick" style racist ones. If the Mods disagree they've obviously not been reading this thread for a while.

For example:



and

Mod note:

We don't get to read every post in the forum. We have a very small number of active Mods and it is impossible to do so.

We rely predominantly on members doing the right thing and reporting amy post that they feel is unacceptable.

Where members do report problems ,and where we agree, we always delete the posts and take further action where necessary.

 

[Pinno718]

Ate horse at a restaurant once - wasn’t great. Starter was all right but the mane was dreadful.