Any good jokes ... ?

[GM]

 

[GM]

Borrowed this from my FB.....

 

[glasgowcyclist]

An ancient Greek goes into a tailor shop with a torn pair of trousers.
"Euripides?", says the tailor.
"Yeah, Eumenides?", replies the man.

 

[Cavalol]

 

[colly]

I'm English and want us to win, but had to laugh at this...
View attachment 417345

That joke doesn't work.

 

[Cavalol]

That joke doesn't work.

I know, it's great!

 

[Dayvo]

In an attempt to improve his performance in the next game, Raheem Sterling has changed his boot sponsor.

He was quoted as saying, 'They will definitely be an improvement as I can't possibly ever play as badly again as I did against Colombia.'

 

[Cavalol]

My new girlfriend dumped me, calling me a liar. Joke's on her, I DO own an airline.

 

[Cavalol]

I've got a friend who's obsessed with completing his Beatles collection.

He Needs Help

 

[morrisman]

We went to a restaurant tonight that specialised in cooking exotic animals and birds.

The Pelican was really tasty, but the bill was enormous!

 

[benb]

Someone just gave me an Apis mellifera
It was a free bee

 

[Hitchington]

Who comes to your front door and takes four hours to sell you a vacuum cleaner?

Jehoovers Witness

 

[Chris S]

Who comes to your front door when you are having a party?
Jehovah's Gatecrashers

 

[Cavalol]

 

[Profpointy]

We went to a restaurant tonight that specialised in cooking exotic animals and birds.

The Pelican was really tasty, but the bill was enormous!

Went to a similar restaurant who had all sorts of exotic beasts on the menu, , so I ordered an elephant ear sandwich. Sheepishly, they admitted it wasn't available."Ha !", I said, "I knew you'd not really have elephant. It's just a sham" . "Oh no" , they replied, "we have elephant ears, it's just that we've run out of giant buns"