Any good jokes ... ?

[Cavalol]

We never got that far, did I mention she was psychic? She finished with me before I met her.

 

[raleighnut]

We never got that far, did I mention she was psychic? She finished with me before I met her.

Strange it's normally blokes that suffer from that condition.

 

[bruce1530]

A friend who suffered all his life from Coeliac disease and gluten intolerance has sadly passed away.

His family have requested no flours at the funeral...

 

[Welsh wheels]

How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.

 

[Cavalol]

Can someone tell me who played Forrest Gump?

T.hanks.

 

[Cavalol]

The shareef don't like it

 

[Cavalol]

I've just released my first 7" single on Vinyl.

A side: Oh I do like to be

B side: the seaside.

 

[morrisman]

I can't take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him.
Guess that's what I get for buying a pure bread dog.

 

[ADarkDraconis]

I can't take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him.
Guess that's what I get for buying a pure bread dog.

At least your dogs are not in-bread...

 

[Electric_Andy]

Just found out that my new smart phone has a really cool new feature. It displays how much the handset cost at the top. It's not very accurate though, I didn't quite pay 4g but close enough

 

[Cavalol]

‘Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds’

John Lennon was rubbish at Cluedo.

 

[morrisman]

Who led the Jews through a semi permeable membrane?

Osmoses

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

In 1964, Steve McQueen won a Superman lookalike contest because he was in the greatest cape

 

[Cavalol]

Anyone got the new 60p coin to celebrate the Queen running the London marathon?

 

[Cavalol]

I have a complex multiple-personality disorder. Some days I think I'm a temptress in a Bizet opera, other days I'm convinced I am the head of the German Luftwaffe in the Second World War.


I don't really know whether I'm Carmen or Goering.