Any good jokes ... ?

[glenn forger]

The cat has just brought a moose in from the garden. Must talk to him about his spelling.

 

[RichardB]

The cat has just brought a moose in from the garden. Must talk to him about his spelling.

Maybe you just have a Scottish cat.

 

[TVC]

Has anyone seen where my giant talking dog as gone, I haven't got a Scoobie.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

When I was a boy scout, I learned a lot about Indian cooking.

I have the bhajis to prove it.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

It's strange isn't it ?
You stand in the middle of the library and go "Aaaaaaaaargh!!" and everyone stares at you.
But do it on a plane and everyone joins in.

 

[ufkacbln]

Anyone got any good "what's the difference" jokes?

....

The classic
What is the difference between a Duck?

One of its legs are both the same

 

[Profpointy]

The classic
What is the difference between a Duck?

One of its legs are both the same

what's the difference between a stoat and a weasel ?
A stoat's stotally different, but the weasel's weasilly distinguishable.
(doesn't work quite as well written down)

 

[Profpointy]

and for the brummie cowboy, what' the difference between a buffalo and a bison?

You can't wash your hands in a buffalo

 

[TVC]

What's the difference between an Islamic Terrorist and Donald Trump?
One is hell bent on generating hatred and division whilst tearing apart all the bonds of tolerance and mutual support that make Western society strong and inclusive, and the other is an Islamic Terrorist.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

What's the main difference between intelligence and ignorance?

I don't know and I don't give a toss!

 

[Cubist]

A seagull and a puppy with an upset tummy?

One flits across the shore...........

 

[Cubist]

Adolf Hitler and Mrs Cube?

One's an evil dictator with a peculiar mustache











, and the other was leader of the Third Reich.

 

[machew]

What's the difference between an Islamic Terrorist and Donald Trump?
One is hell bent on generating hatred and division whilst tearing apart all the bonds of tolerance and mutual support that make Western society strong and inclusive, and the other is an Islamic Terrorist.

That's not a joke, that's fact

 

[AM1]

Spent all morning sorting out my U2 CD's

But I just couldn't find what I was looking for

 

[AM1]

Breaking News,

George Michael has been taken to hospital with a chocolate bar up his bum

It has been reported that it was a careless wispa