Any good jokes ... ?

[Toshiba Boy]

I need a potato clock apparently....
I told my wife the plumber was calling round at 9 o'clock and she said "Well, you better get a potato clock"

 

[Alex321]

I need a potato clock apparently....
I told my wife the plumber was calling round at 9 o'clock and she said "Well, you better get a potato clock"

I had to read that about 5 times before I got it. I was looking for a double-entendre which wasn't there.

 

[DaveReading]

Added to the list of clock jokes for the grandkids ...

 

[Alex H]

 

[Cavalol]

Just had the worst day ever. I paid a joiner to make me a double bed, and he's done a bunk.


It's just one thing on top of another.

 

[tyred]

 

[Toshiba Boy]

"Time" for the Stonehenge joke.....

 

[tyred]

 

[Toshiba Boy]

Changed our clock ......

 

[Profpointy]

View attachment 711677

In a similar vein

I helped my Uncle Jack off his horse
vs
I helped my Uncle jack off his horse

----

Woman without her man, is nothing
Woman, without her, man is nothing

----

It's the difference between knowing your shoot and knowing you're shoot

 

[Littgull]

"In a similar vein

I helped my Uncle Jack off his horse
vs
I helped my Uncle jack off his horse"
To highlight the grammar difference one of the lines should be 'Uncle Jack' with a capital 'J'

 

[Cavalol]

There was a fire drill at IKEA today.

We all assembled in the car park.

 

[tyred]

 

[Electric_Andy]

My Dad has the heart of a Lion...and a lifetime ban from the Zoo

 

[srj10]

My Father has the heart of a lion
And a lifetime ban from the zoo.

My Dad has the heart of a Lion...and a lifetime ban from the Zoo

These lions need better protection 🙀