Any good jokes ... ?

[roadrash]

I respect giraffe's...​

They're an animal I can look up to.

 

[roadrash]

A giraffe can grow up to 18 feet , but usually only have 4

 

[craigwend]

View attachment 630427

 

[burntoutbanger]

WHy do elephants paint their toes red??





so they can hide in cherry trees!





have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree



no


shows how well it works!!!

What's the loudest noise in the jungle?








Giraffes eating cherries...

 

[Profpointy]

I respect giraffe's...​

They're an animal I can look up to.

Not a joke as such but I found this very funny


View: https://youtu.be/xiHl_Fr8als


To be fair even the giraffe seems to think it a good game as he came back to let the guy try a 3rd time.

 

[morrisman]

My friend has a strange, solitary hobby making himself models of Wiltshire market towns.

That said, he’s quite happy being left to his own Devizes.

Why do they fry whole potatoes in fish and chip shops in Wiltshire?
Because they have no Devizes for Chippenham

 

[bruce1530]

A donkey meets a racehorse in a pub. They get talking, find each other to be good company, and after "last orders" the racehorse says "Why don't you come back to my stables, we've got all mod cons, I've got a fridge full of beers...."

So they go back to the racehorse's stable. The walls are decorated with photos.

"What's that?" says the donkey. "Oh, that's me the time I won the Grand National"
"What's that one?" "That's me with the Queen at Royal Ascot"
"That one?" "That's me at the Derby..."

The donkey's thinking "I can't compete with that - this racehorse is a superstar, I'm just a donkey from Blackpool beach". He drinks up his beer and goes home.

A couple of weeks later, they meet again. After "last orders", the donkey says "This time, we'll go back to my stables"

They arrive at the donkey's stable, and on the wall is a huge picture of a Zebra.

"What's that?" says the racehorse.

"Oh, that.... that's me when I played for Juventus..."(*)



(*) or Newcastle. Or St Mirren. or....

 

[Bianchi boy]

The last time i went to Blackpool, i went on a Donkey..................took me three days to get there

 

[PeteXXX]

The invisible man is at the door...

Tell him I can't see him!

 

[tyred]

 

[PaulB]

While I was riding my bike yesterday I saw a suitcase at the side of a quiet country lane which on inspection was found to contain some tiny kittens. This upset me and I thought the best thing to do would be to ring the RSPCA. A nice woman answered so I told her of the location and what I'd seen. "Were they moving?" was her first question. "Well that would explain the suitcase." I replied.

 

[Dayvo]

 

[ClichéGuevara]

 

[DaveReading]

Presumably for reports that have been greatly (or wildly) exaggerated ...

 

[Dayvo]