Any good jokes ... ?

[raleighnut]

I think it's ridiculous that people are letting off fireworks in September.
My cat was so scared, he ran up the Christmas tree.

You say that but in all seriousness I saw my first 'Mince Pies' of the season in the Co-op yesterday as I was buying Maz some 'Hot Cross Buns'

 

[Dayvo]

 

[VelvetUnderpants]

 

[VelvetUnderpants]

 

[simon the viking]

four engineers are sitting in a car that wont start...

The Mechanical engineer says "it must be the starter motor"
The Electrical engineer says "it must be the battery"
The Chemical engineer says "It must be fuel contamination"
The I.T engineer says.............

"Shall we get out and then back in again?"

 

[tyred]

 

[tyred]

 

[Dayvo]

 

[Dayvo]

 

[simon the viking]

View attachment 609542

And don't forget.... before you question any of your wife's choices... remember you're one of them

 

[tyred]

 

[Seevio]

The video game Mortal Combat was inspired by Scandinavian Church music.

A Finnish hymn.

 

[welsh dragon]

At the breakfast table a woman said to her husband " if i told you that I had won the lottery what would you do"

He replied " I would take half and leave and I would never come back"

His wife said " in that case I won £12.00. Here is £6.00. Stay in touch ".

 

[Cavalol]

I've put a clock in my bird's cage, the constant ticking is driving it crazy.
I'll give it about an hour until it goes cuckoo.

 

[Cavalol]

Before we get to Movember, if anyone wants to sponsor me to only eat triangular Swiss chocolate for the whole of next month I’m doing Octoblerone.