Any good jokes ... ?

[craigwend]

 

[Cavalol]

My home-made nuclear bomb failed to detonate earlier. Oh well, It's not the end of the world.

 

[Speicher]

My home-made nuclear bomb failed to detonate earlier. Oh well, It's not the end of the world.

Search the internet for some new clear instructions.

 

[mistyoptic]

 

[PaulB]

I apologised to my boss for being late but there was a man who'd lost a fifty pound note. He said that's nice helping him look for it but I said, no, I was standing on it.

 

[mistyoptic]

Some recycling here, I’m sure but this still made I larf

 

[morrisman]

Did you know Wales is a triangle with Newport in angle A, St Davids in angle B and Holyhead in Anglesey?

 

[Cavalol]

I bought a packet of those Twinings 'English Breakfast' tea bags. What a rip-off!

You can't even taste the bacon or anything.

 

[PeteXXX]

Not sure if this should be in the jokes thread or N&Ca or a Covid thread!

 

[morrisman]

Glen Campbell weighs 57.15 KG
He’s a Nine Stone Cowboy

 

[betty swollocks]

My first jab was Pfizer.
My second jab was Oxford Astrazeneca.
I've now contracted mixingmydoses.

 

[PaulB]

The police want to interview me. Strange, I didn't even apply for a job.

 

[PaulB]

 

[postman]

i was in Blackpool last week.i was outside a really nice guest house.It had a notice in the window vacancies.So i knocked on the door a window above me opened and a rather grumpy looking women peered her head out.Excuse me i said,i would like to stay here.Please yourself love she shouted down then shut the window with a bang.

 

[Chris S]

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?
He worked it out with a pencil.