"The Tourist" starring Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp.
Within 2 minutes of it starting, I had decided that it was really bad but I carried on watching to see if it was intended to be a spoof. I don't think it was ... It was truly dire! I looked it up on IMDB afterwards to see if was just me having a grumpy evening. Somehow or other it got a rating of 6/10, but there were an awful lot of people who felt the same way as me.
Depp looked tired and puffy-faced, as if he had not slept for a week after recovering from cosmetic surgery.
Jolie frequently wore expensive frocks and was presumably supposed to look glamorous, but instead looked very odd and uncomfortable in them.
There was no chemistry whatsoever between the two stars despite them supposedly having 'a thing' for each other, so the sexy scenes weren't sexy. The tense scenes weren't exciting. The humour wasn't funny. Venice looked like it was a cheap set made to look vaguely like Venice. I would have written the script for a tenth of the fee, and it would have been ten times better - still crap, but crap at an affordable price!
Apparently, they spent $100 million on that film. It is almost impossible to figure out where the money went! Maybe $49 million each for the 2 stars, and $2 million for everything else combined?
This movie is only fit for 2 things ...
- A distraction from the pain of tooth extraction without anaesthesia.
- A treatment for insomnia.