grldtnr
Über Member
That looks like which you might find under Chris' s Tartan kilt,
His been called 4 eyes for nowt , children can be so cruel with name calling
True Facts About Chris Rea
- Thread starter Drago
- Start date
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That looks like which you might find under Chris' s Tartan kilt,
His been called 4 eyes for nowt , children can be so cruel with name calling
.....and well done one and all , we have overtaken that other nonsense thread , Accy the style pirates thread the ' Dress style ' thread, we're got to keep ahead now 
lazybloke
Ginger biscuits and cheddar
- Location
- Leafy Surrey
After a few journeys by TURDIS, Chris Rea is at The Tan Hill Inn enjoying a few drinks and a chinwag with Cleopatra, Ollie Reed, The Queen Mother, Lindsay Lohan, and Sir Ranulph Fiennes. At the last minute they also added Earnest Shackleton, just in case the lock-in lasts longer than expected.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea keeps his lustrous beard in prime condition with a nightly poultice of marmite and domestos.
grldtnr
Über Member
Really !? Must try that with mine, but must it be Marmite and Domestos, being 'virtual ' snow in here I can just about make my local 'Aldi' store, they don't stock either brand.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea was the first guest star to appear on the Love Boat.
Thanks to his rampant misuse of time travel Chris Rea was the 6th, 7th, 8th, 6th again, and 9th Beatle.
And as he knew the success that lay ahead every time he left he stitched them up good and proper on the copyrights, his share is worth more than Lennon and McCartney's combined.
And as he knew the success that lay ahead every time he left he stitched them up good and proper on the copyrights, his share is worth more than Lennon and McCartney's combined.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
The famous BBC helicopter hovering over Cliff Richard's house was in fact Chris Rea's TURDIS in cloaking mode. Richard was later to split the compo 50:50 with Rea as a mark of gratitude. Rea then lent his share to Gary Glitter who needed the cash to get his computer fixed.
DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
In 1962, Chris Rea, & Time Transit appeared at a concert featuring Gene Pitney, after watching the show Chris managed to meet Gene Pitney backstage, where they had a good chinwag, it was soon discovered that on getting ready to go, that the tour bus had conked out big style, and there was no way off getting to the next show in Tulsa, so Chris offered the full the U.K touring band experience, by packing some gear & band members in the Time Transit and giving them a lift, however, the Time Transit reappeared the day before the Tulsa gig, so they all booked in to a Motel, this is where Gene Pitney met Lydia Strumpet, and had a passionate fling with her, a couple of months later Gene Pitney met Burt Bacharach & Hal David, after telling them about his experience with Chris Rea, they went away & wrote 24 Hours From Tulsa for Gene Pitney which became smash hit for them, it's one of Chris Rea's favourite songs.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Due to a breakdown in the TURDIS while cadging a lift from Chris Re, Gene Pitney was left stranded 24 hours from Tulsa. This inspired Pitney to write a song...
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Ming the Merciless
There is no mercy
- Location
- Inside my skull
The Turdis is leaking agent orange over the north west at the moment.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
The Auberge Field from Chris Rea's TURDIS is responsible for Donald Trump's unusual combover.
grldtnr
Über Member
The malfunctional Porta potty is entirely responsible for Donald Trump's unexplainable election triumph.
America will rue the day Chris managed to Wang over the Porta potty on the Starter handle......surely Chris ought to have realized the TURDIS is a turkey, and should have lunched it in favour of the time Transit,.
But you know how it is is old buggers like to get crocks of shite to run , even if we know we will be spending more time under it with our bag of spanners trying to keep it going!
America will rue the day Chris managed to Wang over the Porta potty on the Starter handle......surely Chris ought to have realized the TURDIS is a turkey, and should have lunched it in favour of the time Transit,.
But you know how it is is old buggers like to get crocks of shite to run , even if we know we will be spending more time under it with our bag of spanners trying to keep it going!
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DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c0rne2d540lo
In Brazil, a former city councillor has been accused of removing a toilet bowl & 2 sinks from her office after losing her attempt at reelection, Janaina Lima claims she paid for them out of her own pocket, but was caught on film removing them from her Sao Paulo Office, claiming she intended to donate them to the chamber, however the chamber she is actually referring to is her own Turdis build, having got wind of Chris Rea's machine, but she has cancelled plans to build a time travelling potty after being caught acquiring the luxury bathroom furniture illegally, and has returned the Portable plastic potty to Sistemas sanitários pesados de São Paulo for a refund, unfortunately in English that translates to Sao Paulo heavy duty toilet systems, or S.H.I.T.S for short, Chris Rea was not available for comment.
In Brazil, a former city councillor has been accused of removing a toilet bowl & 2 sinks from her office after losing her attempt at reelection, Janaina Lima claims she paid for them out of her own pocket, but was caught on film removing them from her Sao Paulo Office, claiming she intended to donate them to the chamber, however the chamber she is actually referring to is her own Turdis build, having got wind of Chris Rea's machine, but she has cancelled plans to build a time travelling potty after being caught acquiring the luxury bathroom furniture illegally, and has returned the Portable plastic potty to Sistemas sanitários pesados de São Paulo for a refund, unfortunately in English that translates to Sao Paulo heavy duty toilet systems, or S.H.I.T.S for short, Chris Rea was not available for comment.
