True Facts About Chris Rea

[lazybloke]

I can go back to pastafarianism at the drop of a colander

Done.

 

[DRM]

Chris Rea recently went back to around 120,000 years ago, in the Time Transit, where he met & made friends with Ugg the Neanderthal & his family, he decided to bring Ugg & family back to modern day Middlesbrough, where they live in a luxury glamping pod at the bottom of Chris Rea's garden, as well as providing them with housing, he taught them all English, which they speak with a strong Teesside accent, and got the 3 Neanderthal kids into a local school, Mrs Ugg a job in the local Aldi, Whilst Ugg maintains the garden, and works part time on the doors in Middlesbrough on Friday & Saturday nights.

 

[Drago]

The film The Land That Time Forgot was filmed entirely on location thanks to Chris Rea and his generous offer of the TURDIS. This was cheaper than making sets and models.

 

[grldtnr]

Done.
View attachment 757730

That looks like which you might find under Chris' s Tartan kilt,
His been called 4 eyes for nowt , children can be so cruel with name calling

 

[grldtnr]

.....and well done one and all , we have overtaken that other nonsense thread , Accy the style pirates thread the ' Dress style ' thread, we're got to keep ahead now

 

[lazybloke]

After a few journeys by TURDIS, Chris Rea is at The Tan Hill Inn enjoying a few drinks and a chinwag with Cleopatra, Ollie Reed, The Queen Mother, Lindsay Lohan, and Sir Ranulph Fiennes. At the last minute they also added Earnest Shackleton, just in case the lock-in lasts longer than expected.

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea keeps his lustrous beard in prime condition with a nightly poultice of marmite and domestos.

 

[grldtnr]

Chris Rea keeps his lustrous beard in prime condition with a nightly poultice of marmite and domestos.

Really !? Must try that with mine, but must it be Marmite and Domestos, being 'virtual ' snow in here I can just about make my local 'Aldi' store, they don't stock either brand.

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea was the first guest star to appear on the Love Boat.

 

[stephec]

Thanks to his rampant misuse of time travel Chris Rea was the 6th, 7th, 8th, 6th again, and 9th Beatle.

And as he knew the success that lay ahead every time he left he stitched them up good and proper on the copyrights, his share is worth more than Lennon and McCartney's combined.

 

[Drago]

The famous BBC helicopter hovering over Cliff Richard's house was in fact Chris Rea's TURDIS in cloaking mode. Richard was later to split the compo 50:50 with Rea as a mark of gratitude. Rea then lent his share to Gary Glitter who needed the cash to get his computer fixed.

 

[DRM]

In 1962, Chris Rea, & Time Transit appeared at a concert featuring Gene Pitney, after watching the show Chris managed to meet Gene Pitney backstage, where they had a good chinwag, it was soon discovered that on getting ready to go, that the tour bus had conked out big style, and there was no way off getting to the next show in Tulsa, so Chris offered the full the U.K touring band experience, by packing some gear & band members in the Time Transit and giving them a lift, however, the Time Transit reappeared the day before the Tulsa gig, so they all booked in to a Motel, this is where Gene Pitney met Lydia Strumpet, and had a passionate fling with her, a couple of months later Gene Pitney met Burt Bacharach & Hal David, after telling them about his experience with Chris Rea, they went away & wrote 24 Hours From Tulsa for Gene Pitney which became smash hit for them, it's one of Chris Rea's favourite songs.

 

[Drago]

Due to a breakdown in the TURDIS while cadging a lift from Chris Re, Gene Pitney was left stranded 24 hours from Tulsa. This inspired Pitney to write a song...

 

[Ming the Merciless]

The Turdis is leaking agent orange over the north west at the moment.

 

[grldtnr]

No, the defoliation to leaves and bushes to the Rainforest s of the NW England is because it's cold and winter.
The radiation from the Auberge field ,just looks like Agent Orange.
An understandable mistake to make.