When you see Bob Dylan doing singing and that, it's really Chris Rea standing behind the curtains playing the twangy twangy bits and singing through his nose to disguise the voice meaning he can be himself when he does his songs with Bob Mortimer. He writes all Dylan's words and that. You can see Chris Rea in the background in the Dylan film that missed out in the Oscars.
True Facts About Chris Rea
- Thread starter Drago
- Start date
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OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea has a new job on The Chase as on of the chasers. He being billed as the Bearded B***ard.
DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
Chris Rea starred in the first filming of this years The Apprentice, however he kept nipping back in time using both the Turdis & Time Transit, and he managed to make so much money on each task, that not only did he win, but he actually managed to buy out Alan Sugar, then promptly fired him, the BBC were furious as they had to start from scratch, using a fresh selection of grade 1 numpties
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Alan Sugar was so furious he challenge Chris Rea to an arm wrestling match to settle the matter. Rea has yet to accept.
Dogtrousers
Kilometre nibbler
Chris Rea is working on a remake of Planet of the Apes, but with the apes replaced by garden gnomes.
Way-Out-West
Member
Chris Rea’s records are full of subliminal messages. On one track, if played backwards you can hear lleh ot daor eht.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea has invented a new wood preservative with black pudding as a main ingredient. C.ReaSote will be on sale before the summer.
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DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
Chris Rea stole the original Eiffel Tower, and had it rebuilt in Blackpool, in 1894, and was the headline opening act in the tower ball room on opening day
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea led an unsuccessful campaign in 1976 to rename Blackpool as Blackpuddingpool. This was an attempt to spite Richard Madeley who'd bought a holiday home there.
lazybloke
Today i follow the flying spaghetti monster
- Location
- Leafy Surrey
The guy that started Amstrad was originally called Alan Schwartz.
He was affectionately known as 'Sugar' by his most successful apprentice Chris Rea (because Rea couldn't remember the the correct spelling).
The name stuck, so they came up with a plan to pop back to 1947 in the Turdis to tweak the birth registration to make the nickname formal.
An accident with the auberge field means Lord Sugar's chin is permanently stuck in 1947, which is why his beard looks so old fashioned.
Not wanting to cause offence, Chris Rea declared "Nonsense, it looks a luxuriant and wonderful statement of fashion; I shall forever adopt the same hirsute adornment".
That's why they're a pair of beardy weirdies.
He was affectionately known as 'Sugar' by his most successful apprentice Chris Rea (because Rea couldn't remember the the correct spelling).
The name stuck, so they came up with a plan to pop back to 1947 in the Turdis to tweak the birth registration to make the nickname formal.
An accident with the auberge field means Lord Sugar's chin is permanently stuck in 1947, which is why his beard looks so old fashioned.
Not wanting to cause offence, Chris Rea declared "Nonsense, it looks a luxuriant and wonderful statement of fashion; I shall forever adopt the same hirsute adornment".
That's why they're a pair of beardy weirdies.
Ming the Merciless
There is no mercy
- Location
- Inside my skull
Chris has adapted the Turdis to run on black pudding. When the Turdis exceeds the speed of time, there’s an Ecky Thump which reverberates back 65 million years.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Chris Rea was the original choice to play Simon Templar in The Saint but Volvo refused to allow the producers to attach their badge to the TURDIS.
grldtnr
Über Member
As a fellow Essex man. I can confidently call sir Alan Sugar, (nee Schwartz) , a 'Twonk', a succesfull one at that, but a Twonk.
But we know about Chris Rea, he does like to rub shoulders, in this case, he is rubbing hirsute chins, yet another Essex mannerism, which we don't see so much now, but it I derogratory
