True Facts About Chris Rea

[Pinno718]

J D Salinger once wrote:

Among other things, you'll find that Chris Rea is not the first person who was ever confused and frightened and even sickened by Richard Madeley. Chris was by no means alone on that score, you'll be excited and stimulated to know. Many, many men have been just as troubled morally and spiritually as he was. Happily, some of them kept records of their troubles. You'll learn from them—if you want to. Just as someday, if you have something to offer, someone will learn something from Chris. It's a beautiful reciprocal arrangement. And it isn't education. It's history. It's poetry.

 

[Dogtrousers]

Chris Rea was originally cast as Edmund Blackadder but they switched to Rowan Atkinson at the last minute. This is the reason why the series was an unfunny failure (according to Chris)

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Chris Rea signed up to the Bike Radar forum yesterday. He’s upset so many, they are leaving in their droves.

 

[lazybloke]

I haven't got an exorcist handy but I do have a long bolt and correctly fitting fine pitch M14 thread to fit. Do you think he would object to the fitment of this apparatus in a head spinning emergency incident thingy?

Chris Rea's head attaches with Whitworth threads.

 

[Way-Out-West]

Although famously hating the taste of Marmite, Chris Rea eats a full jar each morning straight from the pot.

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea plays a banjo fashioned from and old Marmite pot and a bone from Frank Bough's left leg.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Chris Rea used to go under the nom de plume Miss Whiplash. This is how he came to meet Frank Bough at a party in May 1988.

 

[Dogtrousers]

Chris Rea has a shrine to Frank Bough in his shed where he chants Boughist prayers.

Protect us O great Frank Bough from the evil one who has many names, Dickie Davies being one of them.

 

[craigwend]

In 1977 Chris Rea wrote a song called 'I will share drive' due to the ongoing impact of the oil crisis earlier in the decade (& his early eco-green campaigning) , his record label however rejected it, Gloria Gayner's songwriters overhead it and the rest is history...

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea did all the stunts in Some Mothers Do Ave Em.

Michael Crawford, the nephew of Richard Madeley, deepened the feud by claiming credit himself. Chris Rea took his revenge by getting Betty pregnant.

 

[Way-Out-West]

The Voyager golden records contain Chris Rea’s music and data showing any advanced aliens what he looked like and where his house was.

 

[DRM]

Chris Rea did all the stunts in Some Mothers Do Ave Em.

Michael Crawford, the nephew of Richard Madeley, deepened the feud by claiming credit himself. Chris Rea took his revenge by getting Betty pregnant.

Chris Rea also kept "doing a whoopsie" in Frank Spencer's beret, then blamed it on the cat

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea auditioned to play Blakey in On The Buses, but he blew it at the last moment by throwing a nazzie salute before slapping Olive with his glove and shouting "I ask ze questions!!!"

 

[Pinno718]

Chris Rea's head attaches with Whitworth threads.

Hi ho hi ho, it's back to Screwfix I go...

 

[Drago]

Chris Rea founded Screwfix as a dating agency. His first customer was Judy Finnigan, prompting him to close the company and sell the name,