grldtnr
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That was a 'mammoth ' effort, what was he raising money for?
True Facts About Chris Rea
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That was a 'mammoth ' effort, what was he raising money for?
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Drago
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A new shopping trolley with champagne bottle holders for Richard Madeley.
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Drago
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Although the third time they saw him do it they reminded him.
Word is that Richard Madeley was recently beaten at chess by Mr T, and then just beaten by Mr T.
The muscle bound non-fool sufferer swears blind that the earpiece he had is a hearing aid and not, as has been suggested by Madeley from his Hospital bed, a device from which Chris Rea issues chess playing instructions.
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Drago
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Chris Rea had a small part in Carry On Doctor. He played Hattie Jacques' Matronly love interest, Doctor Auberge-Fool.
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DRM
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https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c871eeez0yzo
Chris Rea's latest project, a Super Space Turdis has landed on the moon, in order to keep the project secret, he opened a workshop in the U.S, his company, Intuitive Machines have built the Super Space Turdis, code name "Athena "with a special jumping mini Turdis, code name "Grace"that can reach a shaded crater in about 5 leaps, as Chris believes this crater is where the soup dragon lives, he hopes to negotiate a sole trade partnership with the soup dragon, to bring her delicious homemade moon broths back to earth, that he will sell online under the name of "Rea's Lunar Broth" as well as the soup Chris has also put on board a 4G telephone mast to be installed on the moon, so that he can ring his soup orders through to the soup dragon directly, on his new ReaCom Cellular Telecoms company, he has also sent the soup dragon a top of the range iPhone, with an Apple Music Account set up with a Chris Rea Essentials playlist setup for the soup dragon too, in a statement Chris Rea said that "this was an exciting opportunity to enhance employment on the moon for the soup dragon, & the clangers who were callously dumped by the BBC" however Rea's Lunar Broth will not be available in the U.S due to the 250% tariffs
Chris Rea's latest project, a Super Space Turdis has landed on the moon, in order to keep the project secret, he opened a workshop in the U.S, his company, Intuitive Machines have built the Super Space Turdis, code name "Athena "with a special jumping mini Turdis, code name "Grace"that can reach a shaded crater in about 5 leaps, as Chris believes this crater is where the soup dragon lives, he hopes to negotiate a sole trade partnership with the soup dragon, to bring her delicious homemade moon broths back to earth, that he will sell online under the name of "Rea's Lunar Broth" as well as the soup Chris has also put on board a 4G telephone mast to be installed on the moon, so that he can ring his soup orders through to the soup dragon directly, on his new ReaCom Cellular Telecoms company, he has also sent the soup dragon a top of the range iPhone, with an Apple Music Account set up with a Chris Rea Essentials playlist setup for the soup dragon too, in a statement Chris Rea said that "this was an exciting opportunity to enhance employment on the moon for the soup dragon, & the clangers who were callously dumped by the BBC" however Rea's Lunar Broth will not be available in the U.S due to the 250% tariffs
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Drago
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Mr T is Chris Rea's masseur.
DRM
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Chris Rea is also in negotiations with Yorkshire TV Studios in Leeds, his proposal is a remake of Jurassic Park, to be called Jurassic Emmerdale, where he opens a park full of Dinosaurs on the North Yorkshire Moors, however disaster strikes when he nips in to Emmerdale to top up the pre-payment card for for the meter that supplies the electric fence ,at the Post Office, however the card machine is down & because the electric fence is off, the Dinosaurs escape, Richard Madeley is cast as the scientist who hides in the outdoor loo behind the Woolpack, only to be eaten by a T-Rex, the animals run riot across North Yorkshire, with a herd of Diplodocus using the radar domes at Menwith Hill as footballs, and Pterodactyls flying over Scarborough and mugging tourists for their fish & chip takeaways, Chris thinks it should be an Oscar Winning film
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Drago
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Chris Rea steadfastly refuses to use Richard Madeley's chosen pronouns.
In any case, despite Madeley's insistence to the contrary, Rea is pretty sure that "your majesty" is not a pronoun.
In any case, despite Madeley's insistence to the contrary, Rea is pretty sure that "your majesty" is not a pronoun.
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Drago
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Chris Rea originally grew his beard so he could shop at Aldi without being recognised.
However, when he tried to shave it off it was so wiry the razor wouldn't touch it so the beard remains.
However, when he tried to shave it off it was so wiry the razor wouldn't touch it so the beard remains.
grldtnr
Über Member
I have a beard.
I shop at ALDI ( pronounced OLDIE !) but nobody recognises me,perhaps I am Chris Rea, never mind being John Malkovich I'm Chris Rea, a Spartacus moment
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Drago
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Chris Rea broke into Richard Madeley's house one night and removed the floppy haired presenters Eagles cassette collection.
Rea took them home and recorded over them all with hours of George Formby, before breaking in the following night and replacing them.
Rea took them home and recorded over them all with hours of George Formby, before breaking in the following night and replacing them.
DRM
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