Things you'd like to say, but can't

[GrumpyGregry]

Given your apparent misgivings over my performance, within, and without, the scope of my role, I do hope that strange conversation today was not the preamble to your asking me to extend.

 

[Ratchet Cat]

Stop being so bubbly and loud! It's Monday morning. I just need to keep my head down and keep working.
I'm not interested in your inane babble.
I'm not a morning person.
I have targets to achieve. Perhaps you think if you slow me down it will make you look better.
No it won't cos I'll just ask to be moved.

 

[Nigel-YZ1]

I like FreeCAD but I'm not getting along with the DXF import. I'm not going to criticise because it's free and a labour of love for the authors.

 

[Profpointy]

Did you know that if you press the button for the floor you want AND the 'close door' button simultaneously the lift will go directly to the floor you've chosen ignoring any other button presses, including people on other floors calling the lift? Apparently.
It's a special lift technicians test procedure (apparently) and is why the lift sometimes goes past your floor without stopping even though you've pressed the button, repeatedly...try it next time you're in a lift.

Hang on, you don't fool me : that's the secret code that jams the lift betweem floors

 

[NorthernDave]

Hang on, you don't fool me : that's the secret code that jams the lift betweem floors

Another handy lift tip: on arriving at your floor if you see one of your colleagues waiting for the lift, quickly press the buttons for every floor before stepping out of the lift. Your colleague is guaranteed to find it hilarious!

 

[Profpointy]

Another handy lift tip: on arriving at your floor if you see one of your colleagues waiting for the lift, quickly press the buttons for every floor before stepping out of the lift. Your colleague is guaranteed to find it hilarious!

I love doing that, especially if it's 10 floors when you can greet them with insufferable smugness when they finally arrive. You only have to sprint to the next floor; there's plenty of time then to beat them to each subsequent floor. Probably best done only with people at a similar grade in the hierarchy rather than the MD

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Run up the stairs pressing the call button on every floor as you pass. Thus beating your "mate" in the lift.

 

[Nigel-YZ1]

So you've been back, from outer space, wanting something from us with that smirk upon your face.
But we changed the stupid locks, we never handed you a key, cos we knew that any second you'd be back to bother we ...us
So now go, walk out the gate, we never saw you cos we were out til late.

...Run out of lyrics but you get my drift!

 

[TheDoctor]

My £15 watch keeps perfect time. So does my £50 smartphone, and my Nexus tablet.
Why can my Windows 10 PC not manage it, even when it's continually connected to the internet and supposedly synching with a time server?
FFS!

 

[GrumpyGregry]

"You're right, of course. It's me. I'm shite at my job. So what does it say about you that it has taken you a year to figure this out. Despite me having been telling you for the last eight months? Sack me, it would be a mercy."

 

[Tim Hall]

"You're right, of course. It's me. I'm shite at my job. So what does it say about you that it has taken you a year to figure this out. Despite me having been telling you for the last eight months? Sack me, it would be a mercy."

Can I borrow that?

 

[GrumpyGregry]

Can I borrow that?

Feel free!

 

[ColinJ]

Given your apparent misgivings over my performance, within, and without, the scope of my role, I do hope that strange conversation today was not the preamble to your asking me to extend.

This isn't about sex, is it ...?

 

[Maverick Goose]

Yippieee ki-ayyy, mother@£$%^&!

 

[Lullabelle]

I made it very clear exactly what I wanted, you even gave me the codes I placed the order, you then sent me what I didn't want then told me you don't do what I asked for! What a waste of my time