Lullabelle
Banana
- Location
- Midlands UK
Things you'd like to say, but can't
- Thread starter Stig-OT-Dump
- Start date
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ColinJ
Puzzle game procrastinator!
- Location
- Todmorden - Yorks/Lancs border
To the driver this evening suffering from a bad case of Penis Minisculis Nervosa ...
Your attempt to scare me off the road failed and in our game of chicken, you were the one who clucked first. What you probably didn't realise was that I had no intention of dying under the wheels of your car. If you had continued the way you were going I was going to leap off my bike immediately before the impact and go feet first through your windscreen, with two SPD cleats aimed straight at your face, you total f**kwit!
The background story ...
I was descending a hill on a narrow country road. The road, where clear, is just wide enough for 2 vehicles to pass each other. I was approaching a row of terraced cottages on the opposite side of the road from me. On my left side was a dry stone wall. There were two blocks of parked cars in front of the cottages to my right. Those parked vehicles had effectively reduced the road to singletrack. Between the 2 blocks of parked vehicles was a gap big enough to get a couple of cars in. 100 yards beyond the cottages there is a blind LH bend.
I reduced my speed and looked over my shoulder. Nobody was coming down the hill behind me. The road ahead was clear. I assumed a position in the centre of my lane on the basis that it would be unsafe to allow any vehicle coming round the bend to approach me until I had cleared the second block of parked cars.
So what happened? Yes, a car came round the bend. The driver saw that I was descending towards him and that there was nowhere on my side to pull over. I toyed with the idea of being nice to him and pulling across the road into the gap between the parked cars when I got to it, but he took away that option. He pulled out into my lane and accelerated up the hill towards me and got to the gap before I did.
For a split-second, I thought his intention was to dive into the gap and let me by, but no - I had no right to be on his road and he was giving me 5 options:
He was red-faced with rage, car horn blasting, obscenities being screamed ...
Now let's examine this situation ... You see a vulnerable road user and decide to aim your vehicle at them on their side of the road at speed, but they are in the wrong for being in your way?
Your attempt to scare me off the road failed and in our game of chicken, you were the one who clucked first. What you probably didn't realise was that I had no intention of dying under the wheels of your car. If you had continued the way you were going I was going to leap off my bike immediately before the impact and go feet first through your windscreen, with two SPD cleats aimed straight at your face, you total f**kwit!
The background story ...
I was descending a hill on a narrow country road. The road, where clear, is just wide enough for 2 vehicles to pass each other. I was approaching a row of terraced cottages on the opposite side of the road from me. On my left side was a dry stone wall. There were two blocks of parked cars in front of the cottages to my right. Those parked vehicles had effectively reduced the road to singletrack. Between the 2 blocks of parked vehicles was a gap big enough to get a couple of cars in. 100 yards beyond the cottages there is a blind LH bend.
I reduced my speed and looked over my shoulder. Nobody was coming down the hill behind me. The road ahead was clear. I assumed a position in the centre of my lane on the basis that it would be unsafe to allow any vehicle coming round the bend to approach me until I had cleared the second block of parked cars.
So what happened? Yes, a car came round the bend. The driver saw that I was descending towards him and that there was nowhere on my side to pull over. I toyed with the idea of being nice to him and pulling across the road into the gap between the parked cars when I got to it, but he took away that option. He pulled out into my lane and accelerated up the hill towards me and got to the gap before I did.
For a split-second, I thought his intention was to dive into the gap and let me by, but no - I had no right to be on his road and he was giving me 5 options:
- Evaporate! Somehow disappear to a parallel universe and let him proceed without the 2 second delay that sensible driving on his part would have created.
- Emergency brake and throw myself and the bike over the dry stone wall to get out of his way.
- Emergency brake and swerve across in front of him into one of the tiny gaps between adjacent parked cars.
- Grovel against the wall and allow him to speed past me with mere inches to spare.
- Just die in the impending crash. Clearly, I was of not worthy of any consideration. It might cause a bit of hassle with the law, but the "I didn't see the cyclist - he just appeared from nowhere" defence usually stands up in court.
He was red-faced with rage, car horn blasting, obscenities being screamed ...
Now let's examine this situation ... You see a vulnerable road user and decide to aim your vehicle at them on their side of the road at speed, but they are in the wrong for being in your way?
fossyant
Ride It Like You Stole It!
- Location
- South Manchester
Chill Colin. Done similar myself. On the best bike coming into Marple Bridge, on my side of the road, but cars all parked on the right. Road again just single track effectively. Guy in a new Landrover Disco (MK2) pulled out into my lane. I didn't slow and kept going, he had to stop, and I shot down a tiny gap between the car and a wall.
Don't give in.
Don't give in.
ColinJ
Puzzle game procrastinator!
- Location
- Todmorden - Yorks/Lancs border
I had the same thing happen on a ride round Mull last year. That was someone driving a big 4x4, not sure what type. The driver actually shouted "Get off my f**king road" at me as he scraped past!
I suppose one day we might meet a psycho who doesn't 'blink' and just drives straight into us!
Still, as you say - we can't give in. The chances of it happening are probably pretty slim.
I might try just stopping in the middle of the road next time and see what happens. I will make sure that I have a camera handy just in case though, because I could see trouble kicking off!
fossyant
Ride It Like You Stole It!
- Location
- South Manchester
Need to get a fat bike with studded tyres and learn how to bunny hop onto bonnets. Sorted.
Andy_R
Hard of hearing..I said Herd of Herring..oh FFS..
- Location
- County Durham
or just D-Lock every one of his windows as you go past
GrumpyGregry
Here for rides.
Guys, I don't know if it is one of you or both but for pity's sake take a shower in the morning, because, come Friday morning, the niff wafting over the desk from where you two are sat is stomach churning.
Lullabelle
Banana
- Location
- Midlands UK
I like make as much noise as I can, meaning I cough loudly and slam the door shut, they soon get the message.
Lullabelle
Banana
- Location
- Midlands UK
To the driver this evening suffering from a bad case of Penis Minisculis Nervosa ...
Your attempt to scare me off the road failed and in our game of chicken, you were the one who clucked first. What you probably didn't realise was that I had no intention of dying under the wheels of your car. If you had continued the way you were going I was going to leap off my bike immediately before the impact and go feet first through your windscreen, with two SPD cleats aimed straight at your face, you total f**kwit!
The background story ...
I was descending a hill on a narrow country road. The road, where clear, is just wide enough for 2 vehicles to pass each other. I was approaching a row of terraced cottages on the opposite side of the road from me. On my left side was a dry stone wall. There were two blocks of parked cars in front of the cottages to my right. Those parked vehicles had effectively reduced the road to singletrack. Between the 2 blocks of parked vehicles was a gap big enough to get a couple of cars in. 100 yards beyond the cottages there is a blind LH bend.
I reduced my speed and looked over my shoulder. Nobody was coming down the hill behind me. The road ahead was clear. I assumed a position in the centre of my lane on the basis that it would be unsafe to allow any vehicle coming round the bend to approach me until I had cleared the second block of parked cars.
So what happened? Yes, a car came round the bend. The driver saw that I was descending towards him and that there was nowhere on my side to pull over. I toyed with the idea of being nice to him and pulling across the road into the gap between the parked cars when I got to it, but he took away that option. He pulled out into my lane and accelerated up the hill towards me and got to the gap before I did.
For a split-second, I thought his intention was to dive into the gap and let me by, but no - I had no right to be on his road and he was giving me 5 options:
We ended up with a variation of option #4. I was not going to allow him space to get by until he slowed down so I rode straight at him. He waited until the last possible moment, braked, and swerved towards the parked vehicles finally giving me 6 inches of space which I dived into. I'm not kidding - my right hand was 3 inches from his car and my left was 3 inches from the wall.
- Evaporate! Somehow disappear to a parallel universe and let him proceed without the 2 second delay that sensible driving on his part would have created.
- Emergency brake and throw myself and the bike over the dry stone wall to get out of his way.
- Emergency brake and swerve across in front of him into one of the tiny gaps between adjacent parked cars.
- Grovel against the wall and allow him to speed past me with mere inches to spare.
- Just die in the impending crash. Clearly, I was of not worthy of any consideration. It might cause a bit of hassle with the law, but the "I didn't see the cyclist - he just appeared from nowhere" defence usually stands up in court.
He was red-faced with rage, car horn blasting, obscenities being screamed ...
Now let's examine this situation ... You see a vulnerable road user and decide to aim your vehicle at them on their side of the road at speed, but they are in the wrong for being in your way?
The good thing is that you came out of it in 1 piece
ColinJ
Puzzle game procrastinator!
- Location
- Todmorden - Yorks/Lancs border
TBH, on reflection, it is not worth dying to prove a point! I think next time I will just stop in the middle of the road and 'negotiate' ...The good thing is that you came out of it in 1 piece
I suspect that the driver's spatial awareness was so poor that he might have thought there was enough room to pass me safely doing over 20 mph. I had immediately realised that between the parked cars and the wall there was only the car's width, the width of my handlebars and less than a foot to spare. I would be happy to squeeze into that gap with the car and me both doing 5 mph, but not when our closing speed was over 30 mph!
raleighnut
Legendary Member
- Location
- One of the 'Elite'
A good fart would shift her out quicker.
swee'pea99
Legendary Member
Friend of mine once d-locked the driver in a not dissimilar situation. He wasn't pleased with himself, and felt he could have handled the situation better, but I don't think it kept him awake nights. 'He'll certainly think twice before he behaves that way again,' he said.
