Things you'd like to say, but can't

[gbb]

Watching the news about the finding of aircraft debris in Reunion island...Sky interviewer asks a former avaiation expert...'and if you were in charge of the investigation, how would the finding of this wreckage help you in finding where MH370 is?'..(or words to that effect)
Now I'm no expert, but I knew what the experts response was going to be...
Jesus, youre supposed to be intelligent people asking intelligent questions...i suspect a six year old could tell you the finding of this piece of wing WONT help them an inch nearer to where it lies.
(expletive deleted)

 

[Herbie]

I don't know anything about the law and Police powers in England, but in Scotland here is what happens.....

In my days in the Police I was once sent to attend a complaint of excessively noisy music from a flat in a rural town in Renfrewshire, this place being about 15 minutes drive from where I was stationed. 'Twas a Sunday night/early Monday morning and complainer couldn't get to sleep and had work in the morning etc... I noted statements from complainer and wife, and told them I was duty bound to give the offender a warning and request that he turned the noise down. I also told them that he would probably turn it back on as soon as we were out of sight, and that if he did, they were to phone us back as we were not going to be far away!

Predictably, the nobber failed the attitude test but agreed to be a good boy and turn the music down. We got in the Police car and I drove round the corner and waited - for all of 2 minutes when the complainer phoned in reporting the noise had started again. In Scotland we have the Civic Government (Scotland) Act 1982 which gives certain powers to the Police in these circumstances. I went back to the offenders flat and knocked on the door. He obviously couldn't hear for the noise, so the door got kicked in. The tenant didn't like this much so began shouting and swearing at us, for which he was arrested. In addition his stereo system was taken as evidence and would have been out of his possession for months. He was taken to the Police station 10 miles away and locked up for a few hours, before being released to WALK home!
We never did get another call to that address .

Result and half that

 

[Saluki]

Do you know what sunbeam. I have worked on a voluntary basis for you, without pay, since last year. I have had no pay, except for free lessons, since November and you are now taking the p***.
You say that you have done the sums and can pay me £10 a week for a few weeks and then, after Christmas, should be able to pay me as much as £20 a week (whoop-de-freakin'-doop) if we can get more schools on board. I have built a schools data base and emailed and then rung every single school in Norfolk, over a period of 3 weeks. This took more than £30 worth of my time.
You are going off touring as a session musician in September, for a year. You've told me what they will be paying you for that tour. You want ME to re-arrange all the pupils to the other teachers, liaise with the schools, suppliers, sort the invoices, keep advertising for new work and actually run your business for you for what you want to pay me. Come September I lose my free lessons as you will be in Prague/Berlin/Moscow/Milan or wherever the hell your bloody tour goes for a year.

I'll tell you what else too.
When I said that I didn't have enough diesel in the car to get to work today, I lied. I have a tank full of the stuff. It was raining, I was annoyed, you do not appreciate that I have got you 79 new customers this year. You don't appreciate that when I email you with details I have their names, phone numbers, email addresses, what guitar they have, what music they like, whether or not they want to do grades or just rock out. That I have told them that you are all DBS certified, have first aid certs, have Grade 8 exams, teach in half the schools around here and generally sing your praises.

I believe in you and I believe in your business but you are hacking me off big time. Maybe I should just work 92 minutes a week and then turn the phone off.
I hope that you have a lovely fortnight's holiday in Florida Disney and I am glad that you have told me that this is the company's most lucrative year so far. I KNOW that it's down to my hard work so stop f*****g praising me for it, and start f*****g paying me for it.

PS. Have a nice fortnight's holiday and business class flight to Disneyland Florida. I am going to stop doing all the 'invisible' things that I do to keep your business running and let's see how that works out and you will see that when your 2nd in Command teacher refers to me as "The Queen of f*****g Everything" (he bought me a mug with that on because he said that the business wouldn't function without me and that they have all come to rely on me), that he might have a point.

And breathe.

 

[fossyant]

Do you know what sunbeam. I have worked on a voluntary basis for you, without pay, since last year. I have had no pay, except for free lessons, since November and you are now taking the p***.
You say that you have done the sums and can pay me £10 a week for a few weeks and then, after Christmas, should be able to pay me as much as £20 a week (whoop-de-freakin'-doop) if we can get more schools on board. I have built a schools data base and emailed and then rung every single school in Norfolk, over a period of 3 weeks. This took more than £30 worth of my time.
You are going off touring as a session musician in September, for a year. You've told me what they will be paying you for that tour. You want ME to re-arrange all the pupils to the other teachers, liaise with the schools, suppliers, sort the invoices, keep advertising for new work and actually run your business for you for what you want to pay me. Come September I lose my free lessons as you will be in Prague/Berlin/Moscow/Milan or wherever the hell your bloody tour goes for a year.

I'll tell you what else too.
When I said that I didn't have enough diesel in the car to get to work today, I lied. I have a tank full of the stuff. It was raining, I was annoyed, you do not appreciate that I have got you 79 new customers this year. You don't appreciate that when I email you with details I have their names, phone numbers, email addresses, what guitar they have, what music they like, whether or not they want to do grades or just rock out. That I have told them that you are all DBS certified, have first aid certs, have Grade 8 exams, teach in half the schools around here and generally sing your praises.

I believe in you and I believe in your business but you are hacking me off big time. Maybe I should just work 92 minutes a week and then turn the phone off.
I hope that you have a lovely fortnight's holiday in Florida Disney and I am glad that you have told me that this is the company's most lucrative year so far. I KNOW that it's down to my hard work so stop f*****g praising me for it, and start f*****g paying me for it.

PS. Have a nice fortnight's holiday and business class flight to Disneyland Florida. I am going to stop doing all the 'invisible' things that I do to keep your business running and let's see how that works out and you will see that when your 2nd in Command teacher refers to me as "The Queen of f*****g Everything" (he bought me a mug with that on because he said that the business wouldn't function without me and that they have all come to rely on me), that he might have a point.

And breathe.

 

[Garry A]

Must remember to never get on the wrong side of @Saluki

 

[fossyant]

Annoyed tonight. Missus phones up from HOLIDAY with our daughter abroad in the sun..... ( our son on also on an outward bound week in uk for his disability). Me at work long hours, been off sick for two days of that with serious pain issues from a bloody op my missus told me to have... yup the snip. Three chuffin years of pain. I've not gone on holiday as I'm dead busy and have no holidays as I've used them up when sick (in pain) I'm now passed a few 'trigger' points that mean I can get a literal bollox at work for being off sick (knut pain at level of elephants sat on you). I'm on a shed load of drugs for pain and my knuts don't work as on injections for male hormones every three weeks.

So, you say I need to read this bloody book and you don't want to come home from a nice holiday whilst I'm at work !!!!!!!!!!!!!!. Thanks. Wouldn't be in this crap without that firkin op !!!!!!!!!

PS I've never said any of that to my missus but I am so bloody annoyed...., and we love each other!!!!!, but this pain is a killer. Loads of drugs that are affecting my ability to work, and the only reason I'm not sacked is I work for a big company, and they see me every day struggling with pain. I'd be out on my ear with a small company/self employed.

Plans for the future, I need to be a bit more pain free. I live day to day.... not planning 5 years hence.....

 

[Saluki]

Must remember to never get on the wrong side of @Saluki

I needed something for my CV as I have been self employed for decades. It seems that employers see 'self employed' and translate it as 'doesn't play nicely with others' (which might have some truth but that's not the point).
He now wants me to totally manage his business while he buggers off around Europe for a year. He wants full time commitment for less money than he is paying his apprentice.
Mostly, I am a lovely person but every so often, I do need to get my hair off.

Edited: Just seen a bloody grocer's apostrophe. Terrible form!

 

[Saluki]

Annoyed tonight. Missus phones up from HOLIDAY with our daughter abroad in the sun..... ( our son on also on an outward bound week in uk for his disability). Me at work long hours, been off sick for two days of that with serious pain issues from a bloody op my missus told me to have... yup the snip. Three chuffin years of pain. I've not gone on holiday as I'm dead busy and have no holidays as I've used them up when sick (in pain) I'm now passed a few 'trigger' points that mean I can get a literal bollox at work for being off sick (knut pain at level of elephants sat on you). I'm on a shed load of drugs for pain and my knuts don't work as on injections for male hormones every three weeks.

So, you say I need to read this bloody book and you don't want to come home from a nice holiday whilst I'm at work !!!!!!!!!!!!!!. Thanks. Wouldn't be in this crap without that firkin op !!!!!!!!!

PS I've never said any of that to my missus but I am so bloody annoyed...., and we love each other!!!!!, but this pain is a killer. Loads of drugs that are affecting my ability to work, and the only reason I'm not sacked is I work for a big company, and they see me every day struggling with pain. I'd be out on my ear with a small company/self employed.

Plans for the future, I need to be a bit more pain free. I live day to day.... not planning 5 years hence.....

A friend's husband had 3 years or so of agony after the snip. Couldn't walk too well, couldn't drive for very long, sold his motorbike as he simply couldn't bear the pain involved in riding it. In the end they took him back in and (I am quoting him here) 'opened him up and did some wiggling about in there' and that seemed to help him no end. Something to do with taking internal scarring away and redoing the internal stitches or something. Also, removing external scarring and making a new 'seam' (I'm assuming a new scar) but it did something to the damaged nerve endings that was causing all the problems. I didn't totally listen as I am a bit tickle-tum when it comes to medical things.
Keep nagging the medics and don't stop nagging

 

[fossyant]

A friend's husband had 3 years or so of agony after the snip. Couldn't walk too well, couldn't drive for very long, sold his motorbike as he simply couldn't bear the pain involved in riding it. In the end they took him back in and (I am quoting him here) 'opened him up and did some wiggling about in there' and that seemed to help him no end. Something to do with taking internal scarring away and redoing the internal stitches or something. Also, removing external scarring and making a new 'seam' (I'm assuming a new scar) but it did something to the damaged nerve endings that was causing all the problems. I didn't totally listen as I am a bit tickle-tum when it comes to medical things.
Keep nagging the medics and don't stop nagging

I am nagging, the bloody things are coming off this time. I've been asking for 2 years. He probably had de-nervation - I can't get it, I've asked.... I've had injections into my nads to help, it hasn't. I am not giving up cycling full stop !!!! Mine don't work now, so no reason to keep (blood tests show shut down).

If it don't work, bin it.... God isn't Mr Shimano Dura Ace or Mr Campagnolo Super Record...

 

[Maverick Goose]

"Do you have to grill kippers EVERY day?"

 

[jhawk]

Sweetheart, if you're going to post the most ridiculous, xenophobic, anti-Muslim, racist sh!te on Facebook, then be prepared for me to tear it apart with some good old fashioned logic and reason and objectivity.

 

[Moon bunny]

Who the hell wouldn't want to get married in a building that looks like a giant penis?


(search for Hoad monument to see what I mean.)

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Who the hell wouldn't want to get married in a building that looks like a giant penis?


(search for Hoad monument to see what I mean.)

Lesbians??

 

[alicat]

Knobbers?

 

[bikingdad90]

Dear 10 Ebayer's who are watching my bike, please don't watch it buy the dam thing! It is a bargain and I really want to buy my new bike!

Actually ended up with over a thousand views and at least 30 watchers but none of them bought it. It didn't sell so I relisted it and within 24 hours had 250 views and 15 watchers. Where do they all come from and why are they all afraid to press buy!

GRRRR, hope Evans do not sell out of the bike I have my eye on. If not I will have to wait until November when the Cyclescheme opens up.