The Military Vehicle Thread

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Drago

Drago

Legendary Member
You lightweights. Being the biggest lad in the Coy. I got lumbered with the Gimpy. Mind you, if I had gone to war I'd have been quite chuffed to be behind the sights of one of those.
 

Joey Shabadoo

My pronouns are "He", "Him" and "buggerlugs"
What kind of Coy was that? Tradition says the Gimpy goes to the smallest guy.
 

DRM

Guru
Location
West Yorks
Oh, that boils my pith!

The M.O.D. always think they know better, and we end up spending three times as much for a product barely half as capable as promised.

We could have bought the Bradley fraction of the price. Sure, there's the argumement about UK jobs, but the billions saved by buying an off-the-shelf product that's known to actually work could have been used in its own way to support employment.

It's like the original. 556. Never worked right, and by the time the money had been spent with a German company modifying and modernising them we could have brought five times as many Steyrs, Colts, whatever. No wonder the RM's went their own way.

Heaven save us from Civil servants. Oh, and there's roughly one civil servant in Whitehall for every two British soldiers! I mean , what the hell ar[MOD NOTE - DRAGO HEAVILY SEDATED AND CARTED AWAY TO A PLACE WHERE HE CAN BE PROPERLY CARED FOR.)

I had a job to do on a rather large Army Camp last year, from what I could see, the vehicle maintenance is now done by Babcocks, I always thought it was REME staff, that looked after them, not private contractors lining their pockets, I bet they'll be no where near the trouble if anything kicked off, go to that dodgy place and service some vehicles in the field, oh and here's a huge bonus for going too, more expense for the tax payer
 

Hicky

Guru
Babcocks now, there isn’t enough REME!
Gimpy goes to one of the Fijians, eejits that is always gibbing off or big n daft.
A1-fiddle, A-2 great, A-3 painted and pimped with lazy beams etc. Heavy but accurate if you know how to use it.
 

Badger_Boom

Veteran
Location
York
Babcocks now, there isn’t enough REME!
Gimpy goes to one of the Fijians, eejits that is always gibbing off or big n daft.
A1-fiddle, A-2 great, A-3 painted and pimped with lazy beams etc. Heavy but accurate if you know how to use it.
I notice that the designers of the A3 have tried to recreate a little bit of A1 magic by including a captive screw that's not quite captive enough to be squaddie-proof.
 

Hicky

Guru
I notice that the designers of the A3 have tried to recreate a little bit of A1 magic by including a captive screw that's not quite captive enough to be squaddie-proof.

Very few things are squaddie proof…cue complaints of we cannot be trusted(while breaking the simplest of things)🤣
 

dicko

Guru
Location
Derbyshire
We had a Bedford 3 tunner in A company.
Our officer lent his SLR against the rear tyre whilst he spoke with us , we were facing the truck. The truck started up and drove off bending the officers rifle barrel. We managed not to smile too much.
 
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Drago

Drago

Legendary Member
We still had the 3 tonner when I was in. On one road trip in Germany I was sat in the rear busy cleaning my SLR when we hit a bump. This caused me to fumble the gas plug which promptly went in a lovely arc over the tailboard. I looked out the back, and lo and behold! There is was perched on the frame for the towing hitch. A couple of the boys grabbed my legs and I leaned out but just as I was about to grab the truck hit another bump and it it went pinging off into the dusk.

Because it was weapon related I eventually ended up in front of the adjutant, who fortunately wasnt a bad sort for a Rupert. He asked what happened and I told him. Happy that it was genuinely bad luck and not the result of negligence or arsing about he let me off with a mild bollocking and GDs for the rest of the month (if memory serves it was 8 days or so.) Could have been worse.

Lesson learned. If I lost another gas plug I'd simply steal someone else's!
 

DRM

Guru
Location
West Yorks
Not Military, but Drago has reminded me of one Scout Camp, probably about 1976/77 when you could do reckless things like hire a removals truck and transport tents, groundsheets, altar fires, food and Scouts in it, so heading along the M62, one of our Scouts became travel sick, so we decided the best plan was to lift the roller shutter, hang him over the drop down back and hold his legs, all was going well until we were spotted by one of the leaders following in his car, cue much frantic hand waving, suggesting it might be a good idea to pull the nauseous one back in, which was duly ignored, as nobody wanted a load of sick in the back with us, so this then led to more frantic hand waving & horn blowing while he got closer to the back of the truck, until being about 6 feet behind us the car was bombarded with a Tsunami of vomit, I can still see the wipers flapping about uselessly, as Sicky McSickface was dragged back inside, you'd get jail time for organising such things nowadays!
 

steveindenmark

Legendary Member
On my ride later, there will be a Green Godess fire engine parked up in a driveway.

I nearly got a Daimler Ferret once as a young man. They weren't that expensive for a while.

I drove Goddessess from HMS Nelson during a fire brigade strike.

They drove like a dream.

Is a sentence, you will ever hear by anyone who drove them full of water.
 
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