The dippy things men say (thread for the women)

[Auntie Helen]

Just got back from cycling home from my choir practice, 6 miles in the dark with a couple of rather hard work hills.

As I turned into our driveway I realised the gripshift for the chainring wasn't working and the bike was stuck on the highest sprocket (fortunately this hadn't happened earlier or I would have been walking up all the hills!) My husband came to the door and I explained what was wrong and he said "well you use that chainring the most so it doesn't matter".

When I went to put my plate in the dishwasher and noticed all the pots and pans from the fantastic roast I created were still on the oven, I said "Did you load the dishwasher"? (this is his job after I cook, and I was out for 2.5 hours at choir). "Yes," he said, so I indicated the two saucepans, two baking trays, chopping board with potato peeler and vegetable knife and bowl into which I measured the food. "Well I put the plates in the dishwasher." So that's OK then.

 

[Smokin Joe]

Seems a pretty decent and helpful sort of a bloke. Think yourself lucky to have him.

 

[Noodley]

So that's OK then.

Glad you realise it.

 

[wafflycat]

When I went to put my plate in the dishwasher and noticed all the pots and pans from the fantastic roast I created were still on the oven, I said "Did you load the dishwasher"? (this is his job after I cook, and I was out for 2.5 hours at choir). "Yes," he said, so I indicated the two saucepans, two baking trays, chopping board with potato peeler and vegetable knife and bowl into which I measured the food. "Well I put the plates in the dishwasher." So that's OK then.

Ah yes... I have a couple of those in the house. Can't expect a man to think and act.. it's obviously a stupid male gene

 

[wafflycat]

Here we go...

Not that this is stereotyping in any way

 

[Auntie Helen]

Seems a pretty decent and helpful sort of a bloke. Think yourself lucky to have him.

Oh I do, very much, I just get so amused by the random things men say sometimes, their willingness to put up with broken things which could be fixed easily and their inability to complete a task before getting distracted to the next thing.

 

[Noodley]

IME males are quite good at doing one thing at a time, and doing it properly. Rather than this 'multi tasking' bollox, which usually involves not doing anything at all but making a fuss about it anyway and flapping about whilst getting nothing done.

 

[Aperitif]

Oh I do, very much, I just get so amused by the random things men say sometimes, their willingness to put up with broken things which could be fixed easily and their inability to complete a task before getting distracted to the next thing.

Auntie Helen, let's face it - without a man you would be all washed up. Men are useful to reinforce the self-assumed strength of women...

<duck Owww!

 

[spandex]

You know what you need is a bloke like.....

















Me

I do all the cooking, cleaning, washing, ironing, shopping.....

 

[Noodley]

I do all the cooking, cleaning, washing, ironing, shopping.....

One at a time and properly no doubt.

 

[spandex]

NO all at the same time as well as walking the dog



I am a pro you know

 

[buggi]

i've got a classic.

Sitting in the garden one sunny afternoon with my ex, we could hear

"cooo cooo cooo"

my ex said "is that an owl?"

i nearly fell off my chair laughing!!!!

i had to explain that owls come out at night and they go "toowit toowoo" and that pigeons come out in the day and go "cooo cooo"

easy mistake i suppose

 

[Noodley]

...and they go "toowit toowoo"

Well, if you were a bloke you would know different owls make different noises. One at a time.

 

[Fab Foodie]

Easy mistake. Was it Alvin Stardust?

No. It's easy to identify Alvin Stardust in the wild; he sounds like a pigeon but (and this is the important bit) with a sneeze at the end...

Coooo, Coooo, Ker-choo.

 

[Chuffy]

No. It's easy to identify Alvin Stardust in the wild; he sounds like a pigeon but (and this is the important bit) with a sneeze at the end...

Coooo, Coooo, Ker-choo.

Then he'd blow his nose and leave the tissue on the floor.