Pro compulsion

[ianrauk]

im guessing at 16 as thats when people start having the ability to form their own judgements, i will cross that bridge as they may mature sooner

how will i cross that bridge? not sure, i guess it will happen naturally, our relationships are very strong and supportive, we have no issues and wont have. do you feel this would be difficult?

Having children myself and one of them past that age, then yes it will be difficult. Teenagers have their own way's of dealing with the world. Do you think your child will listen to you when he's in his/her teens and accept everything you say? Scenario for you. Your child is 15 he wants to go out on his bike, but without a helmet as all his friends do not wear one, hi is under a lot of peer pressure from his friends. Do you let him go out and ride and be happy or do you have a row about having to wear a helmet or not and alienating your child.

As I said, this is a scenario.

 

[david k]

depends how mature i feel he or she is, im not getting hung up on the age as said before, 16 was just presumed guess. maybe at 15 ill think make your own mistakes, if i feel strongly enough about anything i will see the issue through. therefore i will alientate my child if needs be. safety first, id rather have them safe and sulk with me than unsafe and get hurt. that is my parents view

 

[ianrauk]

?? but i cleared that up?? ive said twice now that is not what i meant, why do you keep making out i said something i didnt or didnt mean? thats exactly why these conversations get nowehere, you misunderstood(maybe my fault at first) a point i made, i cleared it up and you keep going back to it.

once again all this does is make you look desperate to find any small loop hole and grasp it as 'evidence' of pro compulsion. this is a wild assumption that is incorrect as said many times before.

then you claim you are not point scoring?

Where have I mentioned in my posts 'pro compulsion'?
You may not be that, you may be, I don't know. I don't care. But what I do know is that you force a view on others where there is no need.

 

[david k]

Playground safe, cycling there dangerous. You sir are impervious to reason.

that is your view/assumption

 

[ianrauk]

depends how mature i feel he or she is, im not getting hung up on the age as said before, 16 was just presumed guess. maybe at 15 ill think make your own mistakes, if i feel strongly enough about anything i will see the issue through. therefore i will alientate my child if needs be. safety first, id rather have them safe and sulk with me than unsafe and get hurt. that is my parents view

Being a parent I find that very hard to believe.
You want whats best for your children no doubt. Alienating them is not one of them and a very strange way of dealing with children.
But each to their own.

 

[david k]

Being a parent I find that very hard to believe.
You want whats best for your children no doubt. Alienating them is not one of them and a very strange way of dealing with children.
But each to their own.

each to their own, im sure if you felt strongly enough and considering your childs safety you would make a difficult decision if it arose

 

[ianrauk]

each to their own, im sure if you felt strongly enough and considering your childs safety you would make a difficult decision if it arose

I would and I have and no doubt will do with the next one. Alienation of your children is a very strange concept.
However telling my children that cycling is dangerous is not one of them.

 

[david k]

I would and I have and no doubt will do with the next one. Alienation of your children is a very strange concept.
However telling my children that cycling is dangerous is not one of them.

well you brought up alienation, i simply said i wouldnt let anything stand in the way of my childs safety. If you prefer a different parenting method such as allowing them to do what they want to do regardless of risk then its entirely up to you. I am not going to tell you how to parent your children

 

[Angelfishsolo]

well you brought up alienation, i simply said i wouldnt let anything stand in the way of my childs safety. If you prefer a different parenting method such as allowing them to do what they want to do regardless of risk then its entirely up to you. I am not going to tell you how to parent your children

I have been thinking about this one and I would lead by example. I would wear my helmet and tell they why I do but also explain that it isn't magic and wont stop them from being hurt all the time. If a child is old enough to question something they are old enough to make a decision for themselves (within the confines of law and reason - I'm thinking sex and drugs et al)

 

[david k]

I have been thinking about this one and I would lead by example. I would wear my helmet and tell they why I do but also explain that it isn't magic and wont stop them from being hurt all the time. If a child is old enough to question something they are old enough to make a decision for themselves (within the confines of law and reason - I'm thinking sex and drugs et al)

thats a very good point angelfishsolo, if they are old enough to question they are starting to inform their own decision making. Mine havnt yet and we have no issues, we put them on without thinking about it, nobody needs reminding its second nature, maybe when it isnt and they ask that is the time i start to reconsider my views, it isnt happening yet so will cross that bridge as and when. as often ill rely on my whits at the time

 

[ufkacbln]

i have never claimed walking is without risk at all, but you know i have claimed that when i walk i am at less risk than cycling and thereofre wear a helmet when cycling and not walking, something many people agree with, anyone who thinks otherwise is in the minority

Again - your misinterpretation, not what was actually posted.



Equally your new justification is completely different (again) from your original.... wriggling again

Instead of the evasion, why not answer your original justification?

 

[david k]

Again - your misinterpretation, not what was actually posted.

Equally your new justification is completely different (again) from your original.... wriggling again

Instead of the evasion, why not answer your original justification?

not at all, this is your assumption and not correct in any way.

your posts do follow and similar theme every time

 

[ufkacbln]

yes i let them play on the equipment without fear as it is completely safe. the ground is made of that spongy stuff and they are exposed to any potential risk for less time

You are joking I presume?

Your impression of completely safe differs from mine!

RoSPA cites 40,000 hospitalisations per year with the HSE roughly agreeing (41,000), according to other groups, 75% of playground fatalities are due to head injury!

The BMJ cites 11% of accidents in playgrounds as head injuries.

So given the sort time of exposure - are you sure that these playgrounds are completely safe?

 

[Red Light]

yes i do and i manage to do it without swearing at people who have a different opinion such as letting their children ride without a helmet

yes i let them play on the equipment without fear as it is completely safe. the ground is made of that spongy stuff and they are exposed to any potential risk for less time

Curiously there is a piece in the Sunday Times today about moves to remove those surfaces and introduce risk back into the playground so that children learn to handle it. One of the quotes is "We are making significant strides in recognising that a risk-averse approach disables children. We are crippling their competence by not letting them learn through experience"

 

[Angelfishsolo]

Curiously there is a piece in the Sunday Times today about moves to remove those surfaces and introduce risk back into the playground so that children learn to handle it. One of the quotes is "We are making significant strides in recognising that a risk-averse approach disables children. We are crippling their competence by not letting them learn through experience"

About time to. Play and the associated risks teach a child so much.