We had someone like that once. I gave him a book to read and he fell asleep reading it. He was always late, one time turning up at 3.30 and I gave him a lift to the station an hour later after I'd woken him up.
Give me some dialogue from your day
- Thread starter Crackle
- Start date
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We had someone like that once. I gave him a book to read and he fell asleep reading it. He was always late, one time turning up at 3.30 and I gave him a lift to the station an hour later after I'd woken him up.
Andrew_Culture
Internet Marketing bod
- Location
- The People's Republic Of Suffolk.
Oh this fellow is very smart and hard working, remarkable in fact, it just made me smile how different our opinions of hardship are
MattHB
Proud Daddy
- Location
- Deepest darkest Dorset
Colleague (and I use the term loosely): you're getting sick because of the rain..
Me: how so?
Colleague: because its rained so much it's pushed the germs out of the drains and you're riding through it
Me: ..........
Me: how so?
Colleague: because its rained so much it's pushed the germs out of the drains and you're riding through it
Me: ..........
Andrew_Culture
Internet Marketing bod
- Location
- The People's Republic Of Suffolk.
You know, there are days when I look upon my fellow brother and sister with a gentle optimistic hope that maybe one day we'll evolve into a brighter future that will nurture a brave new world of love and logic.
Then there are days I read about people thinking germs are pushed out of drains by rain...
gbb
Squire
- Location
- Peterborough
A sad one i'm afraid...
My wife's telling me about friends who's son has just died (mid 40s) and the plans for his funeral etc.
He was a far from perfect person, in fact many here (if you knew him) wouldnt give him the time of day (and he only had himself to blame for that)
His son and daughter(about 10 and 13) despite everything, doted on him are worried they're going to forget his face, stuff like that and they're worried his ashes will get scattered and they won't know where he is.
My wife said, 'why don't you bury his ashes in their box, in the garden, have a special corner for him'
All of them (the kids and his mother loved the idea, that's it then, and they started planning where, what etc etc.
As my wife was telling me, i felt myself welling up. My brother died 4 plus years ago, it was suddenly like yesterday.
'I'm sorry' she said.
Me...'No, it's ok, anyway, doesn't matter what a sh1t you've been most of your life (the guy that died), kids and parents love you no matter what...'
My wife's telling me about friends who's son has just died (mid 40s) and the plans for his funeral etc.
He was a far from perfect person, in fact many here (if you knew him) wouldnt give him the time of day (and he only had himself to blame for that)
His son and daughter(about 10 and 13) despite everything, doted on him are worried they're going to forget his face, stuff like that and they're worried his ashes will get scattered and they won't know where he is.
My wife said, 'why don't you bury his ashes in their box, in the garden, have a special corner for him'
All of them (the kids and his mother loved the idea, that's it then, and they started planning where, what etc etc.
As my wife was telling me, i felt myself welling up. My brother died 4 plus years ago, it was suddenly like yesterday.
'I'm sorry' she said.
Me...'No, it's ok, anyway, doesn't matter what a sh1t you've been most of your life (the guy that died), kids and parents love you no matter what...'
- Location
- Shrewsbury, Shropshire
Strange! I hope said person disinfects his car door handles before touching them with all that filthy road spray on them!
Lanzecki
Über Member
- Location
- A Boreen, Ireland
They are probably the same people that think the more a swimming pool smells of chlorine the more chlorine it has in it, and therefore the safer.
**Editied to make more sense. Failed I think
Andrew_Culture
Internet Marketing bod
- Location
- The People's Republic Of Suffolk.
They are probably the same people that think the more a swimming pool smells of chlorine the more chlorine it has in it, and therefore the safer.
**Editied to make more sense. Failed I think
Having swum many times in the pool at a special school where the swimmers would wait till they were in the pool to take a shoot I can confirm that a strong smell of chlorine ain't good. Nor is the resulting sinitus from having to swim with the incontinent.
Arch
Married to Night Train
- Location
- Salford, UK
Not involving me, but spotted at the weekend in a comments book at a little WWII period room display inside a big antiques/flea market.
"Please get the uniforms right on your moddles. Some of them are from the 1960's"
And below that in another hand:
"Learn to spell models before you pick others up on their mistakes"
And below that in a third hand:
"Now now children!"
"Please get the uniforms right on your moddles. Some of them are from the 1960's"
And below that in another hand:
"Learn to spell models before you pick others up on their mistakes"
And below that in a third hand:
"Now now children!"
Andrew_Culture
Internet Marketing bod
- Location
- The People's Republic Of Suffolk.
[QUOTE 2243684, member: 76"]This gem arrived on my desk today.....
"Following the completion of the self-guided formalised events a period of non-formalised facilitated 1/2 day events will take place embedding the learning from the formalised learning through the trainer led 5 day structured programme which will have had an agenda determined by the attendees and delivered through the use of appropriate strategies and materials as defined in Appendix B"
They are going to have to re-open Bletchley Park to decypher it
Oh, just to be clear that is verbatim, there were really no commas or other signs of punctuational life
[/quote]
Www.dilbert.com is medicine.
"Following the completion of the self-guided formalised events a period of non-formalised facilitated 1/2 day events will take place embedding the learning from the formalised learning through the trainer led 5 day structured programme which will have had an agenda determined by the attendees and delivered through the use of appropriate strategies and materials as defined in Appendix B"
They are going to have to re-open Bletchley Park to decypher it
Oh, just to be clear that is verbatim, there were really no commas or other signs of punctuational life
[/quote]Www.dilbert.com is medicine.
Lanzecki
Über Member
- Location
- A Boreen, Ireland
My local pool has a special suction thing for removing unwanted items.... I stopped going there and started going to the private club that I pay 3 times the cost to swim in. But there's no smell, a 50m pool that you can see the length of underwater it's that clean. Not to mention you can do a length without having a child jump on you
Supersuperleeds
Legendary Member
- Location
- Leicester
Car driver "Sorry I didn't see you"
Me, as I pick myself up off the road, "I've three f***ing front lights, how many f***ing lights do I f***ing need for you to see me?" Or words to that effect.
Me, as I pick myself up off the road, "I've three f***ing front lights, how many f***ing lights do I f***ing need for you to see me?" Or words to that effect.
Psycolist
NINJA BYKALIST
- Location
- North Essex
[QUOTE 2243684, member: 76"]This gem arrived on my desk today.....
"Following the completion of the self-guided formalised events a period of non-formalised facilitated 1/2 day events will take place embedding the learning from the formalised learning through the trainer led 5 day structured programme which will have had an agenda determined by the attendees and delivered through the use of appropriate strategies and materials as defined in Appendix B"
They are going to have to re-open Bletchley Park to decypher it
Oh, just to be clear that is verbatim, there were really no commas or other signs of punctuational life[/quote]
You should have asked to set up a course in understanding memo speak, somebody would have organised it. The likely outcome would be to remove staff from the part of the business that actually generates income, to run it for them. But of course, they would have to be sent on a course to learn how to run the course first, of course !
"Following the completion of the self-guided formalised events a period of non-formalised facilitated 1/2 day events will take place embedding the learning from the formalised learning through the trainer led 5 day structured programme which will have had an agenda determined by the attendees and delivered through the use of appropriate strategies and materials as defined in Appendix B"
They are going to have to re-open Bletchley Park to decypher it
Oh, just to be clear that is verbatim, there were really no commas or other signs of punctuational life
[/quote]You should have asked to set up a course in understanding memo speak, somebody would have organised it. The likely outcome would be to remove staff from the part of the business that actually generates income, to run it for them. But of course, they would have to be sent on a course to learn how to run the course first, of course !
Night Train
Maker of Things
- Location
- Greater Manchester
I don't like public swimming pools because of the chlorine and stuff.My local pool has a special suction thing for removing unwanted items.... I stopped going there and started going to the private club that I pay 3 times the cost to swim in. But there's no smell, a 50m pool that you can see the length of underwater it's that clean. Not to mention you can do a length without having a child jump on you
The best pool I swam in is at Baskerville Hall Hotel, it is flowing spring water fed and so clean you can almost drink from it. Not sure if that is still the case as the website now says it is heated, it wasn't when I stayed there.
Matthew_T
"Young and Ex-whippet"
- Location
- Prestatyn, North Wales
Flopsy the rabbit: Hey Flipsy (another rabbit), watch this!
*Rabbit runs across path*
Me: Argh!
Get out of the f*cking way!
*Rabbit then runs into bushes on other side*
Flipsy: That was awsome, did you see the look on his face?
Flopsy: Yeah, but he blinded me with his light!
Flipsy: You should have just let him run you over.
Flopsy: Why?
Flipsy: Because you are a silly bunny!
Me: FFS!
(I b-harely avoided him!)
*Rabbit runs across path*
Me: Argh!
Get out of the f*cking way!*Rabbit then runs into bushes on other side*
Flipsy: That was awsome, did you see the look on his face?
Flopsy: Yeah, but he blinded me with his light!
Flipsy: You should have just let him run you over.
Flopsy: Why?
Flipsy: Because you are a silly bunny!
Me: FFS!
(I b-harely avoided him!)
