Give me some dialogue from your day

[Arch]

We've got a new yard cleaner at work, nice enough chap, late 50s, very agricultural accent (maybe Suffolk or Norfolk)...nice enough but has some odd behaviour, always chucking in odd comments about anything and everything, keeps telling you the obvious, just slightly annoying...
So today i have an industrial bin with a dodgy castor to replace. Simple job, chock or jack it up, undo 4 bolts, replace castor, job done.

He's brought it to me on a hand pallet truck, with a couple of bits of timber resting on the forks to give the truck enough height to reach the bin. Just the job actually because it meant i had the means to get the wheel off the floor without even trying. Its what i'd have probably have done anyway.

After i'd fixed it, he said
'were you wary about my timber trick ?'
'Eh ?'
'i put some timbers on the forks so it'd reach the bin, it's a trick i learned years ago'
' No it was fine, it aint rocket science'

Odd fella....

Sounds to me like he was proud of thinking of it, (or of learning it), and was prompting for you to say what a good idea it was.

 

[Cubist]

Context
A mate and I had just returned from a day's MTBing at Coed Llandegla. We arrive at his house to drop him off and after unloading his bikes go up to the kitchen for a cuppa, where his MIL is helping to lay the table for their evening meal.

MIL"Where did you go cycling?"
Mate "Wales"
MIL "Have you both been cycling?"
Me "Yes"
MIL "To Wales?"
Mate "No, in Wales. Cubist drove us there."
MIL "Will you be cycling home now then Cubist?"
ME "No, I'd only have to come back for the car later."
MIL "Did you leave your car here then?"
Mate "Can we start again?"

 

[Andrew_Culture]

Ten minutes into a call with an American fellow at a large web-hosting company he decides to try and sweeten me up by giving me a compliment,

'im - "You know what, you sound like you've mastered speaking English pretty well"
me - "Thank you, that's very kind"


<context>He's ringing an English company that uses co.uk domains, is registered in the UK and and has 'UNITED KINGDOM' on all invoices, emails and account details.</context>

 

[GrasB]

Me: so you take the tape from the box with the next working days number on it.
Them: That means you'll skip some tapes
Me: Yes, but that doesn't matter
Them: Yes it does, it means that these tapes will wear out faster
Me: The tapes out last the drives. Anyway users will ask for something to be retrieved from certain day. If we have the tapes numbered by backup order it gets damn complicated to work out which tape it's on. If it's the tape with the day of the month it's easy.
Them: Oh, that's a really good idea. I've never thought of that!
Me: You have a PhD right?
Them: Yeah, why?
Me: Nothing much, just continuing to prove my theory...
Them:
Me (continued under my breath as I turn away to alarm the room): ...that people with post-grad degrees have virtually no common sense

 

[Andrew_Culture]

Me: so you take the tape from the box with the next working days number on it.
Them: That means you'll skip some tapes
Me: Yes, but that doesn't matter
Them: Yes it does, it means that these tapes will wear out faster
Me: The tapes out last the drives. Anyway users will ask for something to be retrieved from certain day. If we have the tapes numbered by backup order it gets damn complicated to work out which tape it's on. If it's the tape with the day of the month it's easy.
Them: Oh, that's a really good idea. I've never thought of that!
Me: You have a PhD right?
Them: Yeah, why?
Me: Nothing much, just continuing to prove my theory...
Them:
Me (continued under my breath as I turn away to alarm the room): ...that people with post-grad degrees have virtually no common sense

I really don't miss tape backups!

 

[Arjimlad]

Ten minutes into a call with an American fellow at a large web-hosting company he decides to try and sweeten me up by giving me a compliment,

'im - "You know what, you sound like you've mastered speaking English pretty well"
me - "Thank you, that's very kind"


<context>He's ringing an English company that uses co.uk domains, is registered in the UK and and has 'UNITED KINGDOM' on all invoices, emails and account details.</context>

"But I'm sure I couldn't master American!"

 

[Crackle]

Workmen on the roof opposite putting new slates on; it's windy.

workmen1: I NEED A HAMMER
w2: I'VE GOT A HAMMER
w1: I NEED MY HAMMER
w2: DO YOU NEED A HAMMER?
w1: I NEED MY HAMMER
w2: I'VE GOT A HAMMER
w1: HAVE YOU GOT MY HAMMER?
w2: I'VE GOT A HAMMER
w1: I'LL GET MY HAMMER. I NEED MY HAMMER
w2: I'VE GOT A HAMMER

w1 arrives on the ground and heads to his van

w1: I'VE GOT MY HAMMER
w2: OK

me: thank fark!

 

[Matthew_T]

"But I'm sure I couldn't master American!"

I think there should be a language called American.They have taken the English language and ruined it but placing Z's where S's are and changing 'centre' to 'center'. We need to teach them a lesson on proper pronounciation of words as well.

 

[swee'pea99]

Ten minutes into a call with an American fellow at a large web-hosting company he decides to try and sweeten me up by giving me a compliment,

'im - "You know what, you sound like you've mastered speaking English pretty well"
me - "Thank you, that's very kind"

Bill Bryson tells of being asked where he comes from by a shop girl somewhere in the midwest. 'Britain,' he replies. 'You speak English real good for a foreigner,' she replies.

 

[Arjimlad]

I think there should be a language called American.They have taken the English language and ruined it but placing Z's where S's are and changing 'centre' to 'center'. We need to teach them a lesson on proper pronounciation of words as well.

There's a famous saying in one of Saki's tales where one of his characters says how awful it is listening to an American trying to speak French, and what a blessing it is that they never try to speak English !

 

[marafi]

Me- I think if i learnt how to do sign language it would be very useful when im counselling the deaf.
Sister: *Laughs* really i think its hard and you there is alot of ettquites in sign language. And start counselling those in English first before anything else.
Me- I could try like speaking Japanese, Chinese, korean and Arabic.
Sister (stunned)- Look start learning your ORIGINAL mother tongue language first.
Me- What English?
Sister- ARABIC!

Opps, gosh was i told off about the sign language part. Still no harm in trying! lol

 

[Andrew_Culture]

Me- I think if i learnt how to do sign language it would be very useful when im counselling the deaf.
Sister: *Laughs* really i think its hard and you there is alot of ettquites in sign language. And start counselling those in English first before anything else.
Me- I could try like speaking Japanese, Chinese, korean and Arabic.
Sister (stunned)- Look start learning your ORIGINAL mother tongue language first.
Me- What English?
Sister- ARABIC!

Opps, gosh was i told off about the sign language part. Still no harm in trying! lol

I think you're right! Even one lesson in sign language is great for empathy in general.

 

[Andrew_Culture]

I think there should be a language called American.They have taken the English language and ruined it but placing Z's where S's are and changing 'centre' to 'center'. We need to teach them a lesson on proper pronounciation of words as well.

Actually 'American English' is much closer to old English than our 'British' version.

 

[cookiemonster]

Me - Good luck in Asia

Jensen Button - Thanks. Cars are running well too

I met him while he was doing a Vodafone promo in Islington today along with Lewis Hamilton

 

[gbb]

The wife and myself are verbally jousting in the kitchen, a bit of banter...
I'm cleaning up the dinner plates and said to her...
'You havnt even emptied the dishwasher '
'Your job, not mine, i filled it '
A bit more banter and she started jabbing me in the ribs, which had me squirming....

'Stoppit, stoppit, my back, you're hurting my back

She carried on..
'Stoppit, i'm fragile , you don't know how fragile my back is '
'Maybe not' she replied...'but i do know how you can whine'