Give me some dialogue from your day

[GrasB]

little kid:.. and then daddy dropped something. And his mouth had a big potty break.

 

[stephec]

My work phone has factory reset itself again so I contact our IT department.

Me I'm going to need the instructions on how to configure it again.

IT I'll email them to you.

My phone's reset, I can't get at my emails.

Oh yeah.

 

[KneesUp]

Picked DD up from school as usual on a Wednesday. I was wearing a casual shirt with a pattern on it.

Me: "Hi DD"
DD: "Daddy: why are you wearing that ridiculous shirt?"

She's five.

 

[Crackle]

woman on table next to me: Fragments keep reaching me: "Anyway she's three years older than me and look how she looks..............office.....age........I think it's important........looks.......oh yes......"
Waiter: "Are you ready to order?"
Me:"Yes, the pulled mutton please"
Waiter: "The what?"
Me: "Pork! Pulled pork, sorry"

 

[numbnuts]

Believe it or not I haven't spoken to anybody today

 

[jayonabike]

My 14 year old son:
My teacher smiled at me and said I'm her favourite today
Me:
If she asks you if you want to go to France, say no.

 

[MossCommuter]

Me: "Sorry I'm so clumsy, my fingers are cold, i've been on the open top bus"

Barman: "Well ya not dan yesen ney fayvahs a ye"

 

[gbb]

Dad died yesterday, after a lengthy decline, one that accelerated recently bless him....my young grandkids, his great grandkids, have been told by my son.
6 year old...
' What!!!!, grandad with Jakey' (thats ME, Jakey is our dog)
'No no, great grandads gone to heaven, not grandad '
We're very close to the grandkids, bless her little heart.


Tonight, we're babysitting them, their young sister is poorly and in hospital getting a check over. Im playing the Yes No game with the 9 year old who is reading a question card to me ..i mustn't answer yes or no?
' Im not going to ask that one' She said sheepishly.
'Let me see' I asked.....
It read?.'do you know a soldier ?'
Great grandad was in the RAF, near enough in a 9 year olds mind.
'Bless you angel '

I love my grandkids to bits.

 

[ianrauk]

Thanks, thanks very much for the beers. Much appreciated. A lovely present.

 

[Octet]

VERY strong winds along the West coast, combined with very high tides meant that water was coming over the sea wall and had flooded the road.

You ******* ******

I shouted as a driver shot past me, spraying water up and over my head... and subsequently onto me.

 

[marknotgeorge]

Me: This chap may be a top-flight medical doctor, but he can't spell 'organiser'.
Colleague: He doesn't need to. Doctors can't write!

 

[fimm]

Sorry for your loss, gbb.

 

[Scoosh]

@gbb - for your loss - but you obviously have such a vibrant, close, happy family that I am sure you will all be focussing on the great times you had with your Dad and they had with their Grandad and Great Grandad. There will be , there will be but I'm pretty sure there will also be loads of , and ... maybe even some ...


... and possibly some

 

[Lullabelle]

Earlier I rang my dad

Me: hi dad
Dad: oh hi duck, you alright?
Me: yes thanks, how are you
Dad: fine thank you
Me: thank you for our anniversary card
Dad: you're welcome, to be honest when I took it out of the wrapper it had a '50' badge on it, good job I noticed in time to take it off.
Me:
Dad:

 

[welsh dragon]

My grandaughter when I picked her up today.

Thanks gran. I'm going to buy you the best ever christmas present for giving me lifts home. I was going to get the bus honest, but the fare is £2.00 and I only had £1.40 because I bought some chips for lunch. I love you gran.