Any good jokes ... ?

[Cavalol]

Took the kids skimming down by the lake earlier. The 3 year old went the furthest.

 

[PeteXXX]

 

[JtB]

 

[colly]

 

[glasgowcyclist]

Apparently car dealerships have re-opened apart from BMW.
A spokesman was asked when they would open.
They gave no indication.

 

[PeteXXX]

 

[Arjimlad]

Saw this on a local Facebook page today, just hope there's no one thinking similar at 12,000 feet..

 

[PeteXXX]

The Abbot of the Monastery was very strict in his routine.
Each morning, he'd come out of his cell, go into the main
room where all the monks were sitting, and chant "Good
Morning." They would chant back "Good Morning." At the
evening meal, he'd enter the room and sing "Good Evening,"
and they would reply in kind. One morning, though, in
response to his greeting, he distinctly heard one monk sing
"Good Evening." Wondering if his ears were going, he sang
"Good Morning," only to hear the anomalous greeting again.
Looking about the room, he sang "Someone Chanted 'Evening.'"

 

[PeteXXX]

 

[tyred]

I asked my daughter to pass me the telephone directory.

She laughed at me, called me a dinosaur and handed me her iPhone.

Now the wasp is dead, the iPhone is broken and my daughter is furious.

 

[PaulB]

The lockdown is easing round here as we have a pop concert taking place tonight in the multi-storey car park. It's Level 42.

 

[Archie_tect]

The lockdown is easing round here as we have a pop concert taking place tonight in the multi-storey car park. It's Level 42.

Followed by OMD in the unlit basement...

 

[Beebo]

The lockdown is easing round here as we have a pop concert taking place tonight in the multi-storey car park. It's Level 42.

That’s a bloody big carpark.

 

[Archie_tect]

Is it a lorry-sized one in Kent.

 

[Cavalol]

Just landed in the UK after a long haul flight. The crew were super, smashing, great!


It was a Bowen 747.