Any good jokes ... ?

[Andy_R]

 

[Salty seadog]

A Japanese man in a monastery atop a sacred mountain asks the wise man:

"Master Ayumu, why do all Westerners think that Japanese people look alike?"

"I am not Master Ayumu."

 

[Skanker]

A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for $150." The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?"

The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance."

 

[Cavalol]

I can’t believe how rude the suppository helpline was.

 

[Cavalol]

 

[betty swollocks]

A little noticed report on the Beeb last night was that Roger Daltrey, Pete Townsend and John Entwistle broke into an animal sanctuary yesterday and set all the beagles loose.

Police now know Who let the dogs out.

 

[gaz71]

A Japanese man in a monastery atop a sacred mountain asks the wise man:

"Master Ayumu, why do all Westerners think that Japanese people look alike?"

"I am not Master Ayumu."

That reminds me.... Did you hear about the Look-a-like competition in Japan?

Everybody won.

 

[swee'pea99]

That reminds me.... Did you hear about the Look-a-like competition in Japan?

Everybody won.

Apparently Charlie Chaplin once entered a Charlie Chaplin lookalike contest in France, and came third.

 

[Cavalol]

A little noticed report on the Beeb last night was that Roger Daltrey, Pete Townsend and John Entwistle broke into an animal sanctuary yesterday and set all the beagles loose.

Police now know Who let the dogs out.

You, later

 

[Cavalol]

Just got engaged to a pencil. Can't wait to introduce everyone to my wife 2B.

 

[Cavalol]

Magician: 'I can make ANYTHING disappear'

Tom (holding cup): Ok, do it with my tea.

Magician: (Waves hand)... Done!

om, (holding cup): It didn't work.

 

[Seevio]

I warned my daughter about using her whistle inside and gave her one last chance.

Unfortunately, she blew it.

 

[Salty seadog]

Magician: 'I can make ANYTHING disappear'

Tom (holding cup): Ok, do it with my tea.

Magician: (Waves hand)... Done!

om, (holding cup): It didn't work.

Took me a minute.

 

[Dayvo]

 

[PeteXXX]

Took me a minute.

I'm with him