Any good jokes ... ?

[morrisman]

Psychic buying clothes
Employee: How about this one?
Psychic: No it's too small
Employee: How can you tell you've not tried it on?
Psychic: I'm a medium

 

[Profpointy]

Cricket bat for sale, can be used on other insects.

That deserves a double like (or double groan) !

 

[Cavalol]

My mum refused to believe me that I told everyone the red Teletubbie threw a lemon at me today.

What, Po zest you?





*Reaches for coat

 

[NorthernDave]

My neighbour asked me to stop singing Wonderwall by Oasis.

I said maybe...

 

[Cavalol]

Just ordered some Adam Ant ice cream from Tesco.

Standard Vanilla.

 

[benb]

Just ordered some Adam Ant ice cream from Tesco.

Standard Vanilla.

Are you absolutely certain?

 

[Cavalol]

I accidentally dropped my copy of 'Which' in the bath, and it floated. Doesn't that mean I should burn it at the stake?

 

[NorthernDave]

Just ordered some Adam Ant ice cream from Tesco.

Standard Vanilla.

Ridicule is nothing to be scared of.

 

[betty swollocks]

 

[betty swollocks]

 

[morrisman]

It's a little known fact that Anne Boleyn had a younger brother called Tenpin

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

I walked past the YMCA today, and there was a teenage boy sat outside stroking some feathers.

I said, "Young man, there's no need to feel down"

 

[betty swollocks]

Just been out for a walk this morning and came across Sinead O'Connor doing a spot of bird-watching.

I asked how she was getting on, had she seen many?

"So far, it's been 7 owls and 15 jays".

 

[betty swollocks]

 

[Dayvo]

My wife sent me a text that said, 'Your great.'

So, naturally, I wrote back, 'No, you're great.'

She's been walking around all day, happy and smiling.

Should I tell her I was only correcting her grammar, or just leave it?