Any good jokes ... ?

[Profpointy]

People who can't distinguish between etymology and entomology bug me in ways I cannot put into words.

very very good !

 

[simon the viking]

I know things like this have been posted before but........

 

[Cavalol]

I've been learning how to guess the weight of dogs. Picked up a few pointers yesterday.

 

[colly]

A police officer called the station on his radio. "I need back up here. An old lady shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped." "Have you arrested the woman?" "Not yet. The floor's still wet."

 

[betty swollocks]

Made me laugh....
The rampaging chickens of Jersey.

Maybe they're staging a coup?

 

[Dayvo]

Oh to be a sniffer dog!

 

[raleighnut]

Oh to be a sniffer dog!

View attachment 459599

looks happy.

 

[Dayvo]

looks happy.

Indeed; happy daze!

 

[Cavalol]

Just had some bad news about my Uncle Terry... he is convinced that he's a chocolate orange.

We are thinking of having him sectioned.

 

[Threevok]

I've been seeing a psychiatrist, regarding my recurring dreams of falling through a trap door.

She thinks it's a stage I'm going through

 

[colly]

Have you noticed how many F1 drivers have names linked to Scottish towns?
Stirling Moss,
Lewis Hamilton,
Eddie Irvine,
Ayr Town Centre.

 

[colly]

Breaking news !

Midget holds seance for charity and runs off with the takings. Small medium at large.

 

[oldfatfool]

TEEEEEEEEGANNN FFS DELETE THIS

 

[Threevok]

Due to my Eco Anxiety, I've been sunbathing using herb-based oils, instead of conventional lotions

It's takes ages to get a tan - but I've got thyme on my side

 

[Threevok]

I suggested to Mrs V that we should spice up our marriage by trying a new position tonight

She agreed - that she should lie on the couch and I should stand up in the kitchen, doing the ironing