Any good jokes ... ?

[Chislenko]

I ate it because I wanted to eat what the locals ate!

Don't ever go on holiday where there are cannibals 😊

 

[Electric_Andy]

The goal was determined to be "over the bar" because

The game of football in my day was the basis for Internation Diplomacy
If you can successfully play a game of football with "the lads" without having to call the UN or Ambulance then an Internation Incident is child's play

In my experience, the decision as to whether the goal was in or not (or wide, or over) was governed by the biggest bully on the pitch and/or the owner of the ball. If you disagreed then he'd take his ball home

 

[AndyRM]

In my experience, the decision as to whether the goal was in or not (or wide, or over) was governed by the biggest bully on the pitch and/or the owner of the ball. If you disagreed then he'd take his ball home

It could also be determined by the 'keeper jumping (without much effort) to establish reach and how anything above that wasn't fair.

 

[Cavalol]

My dad always used to say to not be too quick in finding faults.

Good man, terrible geologist.

 

[Toshiba Boy]

 

[Tribansman]

View attachment 736902

The day I lost my thesaurus was a bad, bad day that started badly and got badder and badder. I think a bad man took it, or it was just bad luck.

 

[Toshiba Boy]

Fake or very clever marketing....

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

View attachment 736908

Fake or very clever marketing....

Graphics are a bit questionable as well
again - probably deliberate

 

[tyred]

 

[AndyRM]

The day I lost my thesaurus was a bad, bad day that started badly and got badder and badder. I think a bad man took it, or it was just bad luck.

You are Tony Parsons AICMFP.

 

[PeteXXX]

Yesterday I was having a stroll, in the jungles of Borneo, when I saw a lizard on his hind legs telling jokes.

I turned to a local village elder and remarked.
"That lizard's really funny!"

"Oh, that's not a lizard, " he said " it's a stand up chameleon."

🦎 ☺️🦎 ☺️🦎

 

[Profpointy]

I recently discovered Albert Einstein really existed. I thought he was just a theoretical physicist

 

[tyred]

 

[postman]

So i was in a pub today with my mates.I went to the loo.On my way back a lady stopped me.Are you alright love,well i have felt better,i have a bit of vertigo,swollen legs and ankles,but i am in remission from cancer.Wow she said you need cheering up.How do you fancy sleeping with me only £50 ,well i said i am not that tired at the moment but the money would be handy.

 

[tyred]