Any good jokes ... ?

[tyred]

 

[Richard A Thackeray]

Sister Mary wakes up in the Convent and when dressed, walks to the canteen for breakfast.

As she passes Sisters July and Maggie, one of them giggles and says, “Who got out of bed on the wrong side, then?”

Puzzled, but needing coffee, Sister Mary continues on.

She sees Sister Harriet who giggles and says, “Who got out of bed on the wrong side, then?”

But Sister Harriet moves on before Sister Mary can ask her to explain.

As she enters the Canteen, she sees Mother Superior. Before the Mother can speak, Sister Mary, hugely irritated, snaps, “If anyone else asks me who got out of bed the wrong side, “I’ll scream.”

Mother Superior smiles and says, “I was merely going to point out that you have the Bishop’s boots on.”

As so excellently told by Dave Allen



View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yiawHyLKnks

 

[Alex321]

As so excellently told by Dave Allen



View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yiawHyLKnks

Dave Allen was probably my favourite comedian of all time.

 

[tyred]

 

[Toshiba Boy]

 

[kynikos]

View attachment 718679

right - correct.

Fixed that for you!

 

[Toshiba Boy]

right - correct.

Fixed that for you!

Ah, gee, thanks Control Boy kynikos

 

[Toshiba Boy]

 

[Aescott]

View attachment 718679

Like when I was helping SWMBO to put away the many Christmas decorations. Her exact words: "That's perfect. Just leave it there and I'll fix it later."

 

[Cavalol]

"It's curtains for you!" my boss at Dunelm Mills told me.

Wish he'd be clearer, I don't know if I'm being sacked or promoted.

 

[cyberknight]

Like when I was helping SWMBO to put away the many Christmas decorations. Her exact words: "That's perfect. Just leave it there and I'll fix it later."

put it this way , i darent help put away shopping as everything has to be in an exact place

 

[Andy in Germany]

put it this way , i darent help put away shopping as everything has to be in an exact place

I had a manager who worked like that. She then complained that she had to do everything "because the staff don't seem to have the confidence to make decisions"

 

[tyred]

 

[morrisman]

When I was studying genetic engineering at uni I crossed an alligator with a homing pigeon.
I'm still afraid it may come back to bite me.

 

[Andy in Germany]