Any good jokes ... ?

[markemark]

25K posts, 2M views & I'm still waiting for the first one.

Then blow us away with your wit and post the ‘first’ one.

 

[Cavalol]

Then blow us away with your wit and post the ‘first’ one.

Agreed. You have to wonder how miserable some peoples life must be to be so negative. It surely would have been easier to just scroll by and find another thread?

 

[Cavalol]

As his name would suggest, Charles Rennie Mackintosh invented cocaine, indigestion tablets AND raincoats.

 

[Deleted member 26715]

Then blow us away with your wit and post the ‘first’ one.

Agreed. You have to wonder how miserable some peoples life must be to be so negative. It surely would have been easier to just scroll by and find another thread?

Oh dear humour bypasses installed

 

[mistyoptic]

 

[Cavalol]

A scouser goes on Antiques Roadshow with a very rare vase.
Fiona Bruce: 'How did you acquire this extremely rare item?'
Scouser: 'It was handed down to me'.
Ms Bruce: 'Where from?'
Scouser: 'An upstairs window'

 

[Toshiba Boy]

 

[tyred]

 

[johnnyb47]

Brilliant 🤣🤣

 

[ClichéGuevara]

Tough crowd

I can't remember which stand up comic it was, but I recall a piece he did about how much harder stand up comedy was than being a classical singer.

"For example" he said, "you never hear the crowd at a Pavarotti concert saying 'sit down fat bastard, we've heard it'"

 

[flopner]

As a guy I never thought about getting my nails done but.....

 

[srj10]

A mobile greengrocers has started round our streets it drives me bananas, it takes up so mushroom.

 

[Speicher]

A mobile greengrocers has started round our streets it drives me bananas, it takes up so mushroom.

Do the strawberriess talk very loudly?

The beans runner alongside I suppose.

 

[Speicher]

Lettuce see how many punnets we get!

 

[JtB]

Just tell the Mangetout and not to return.