Any good jokes ... ?

[flopner]

I was reading in the newspaper today that over 30% of baby food sold in supermarkets is contaminated with heavy metals.
I guess that explains why babies are so dumb.

 

[Threevok]

I was reading in the newspaper today that over 30% of baby food sold in supermarkets is contaminated with heavy metals.
I guess that explains why babies are so dumb.

In their defence, I don't think they read the papers

 

[Nibor]

I was reading in the newspaper today that over 30% of baby food sold in supermarkets is contaminated with heavy metals.
I guess that explains why babies are so dumb.

Don't you mean Dense

 

[Profpointy]

Yup - bit like using a teaspoon as a tyre lever
(pro tip - from my Dad - straighten it back out and get it back in the drawer before your Mum notices!)

Back in the day when we were writing software for embedded systems we'd then "burn" the programme into a PROM (programmable read only memory) - a chip with 32 legs which plugged into a socket on the board of the device. Removing them to reprogramme was quite tricky without thr special tool - the special tool was a teaspoon with the handle bent 90 degrees. You could buy an actual special tool but the bent teaspoon was better

 

[Toshiba Boy]

 

[Jameshow]

I was reading in the newspaper today that over 30% of baby food sold in supermarkets is contaminated with heavy metals.
I guess that explains why babies are so dumb.

Or heavy. ...

 

[flopner]

Don't you mean Dense

Perhaps, and they could develop magnetic personalities.

 

[Cavalol]

I've been admitted in to hospital and they are keeping me in, I've only gone and poisoned myself (typical)!
What I thought was a simple onion turned out to be a daffodil bulb. I'm feeling ok but they said I should be out in the Spring.

 

[Cavalol]

A technician is to be sent to the Arctic Circle to work.
"This is your emergency equipment," says his boss. "It consists of a box with various distress flares, a radio and a deck of playing cards."
"What are the cards for?" asks the technician.
"If the distress flares don't work," says the boss, "and the radio is completely frozen, take the deck of cards and start a game of Solitaire. It won't take long before someone taps you on the shoulder and tells you to put the nine of spades on the ten of diamonds ..."

 

[colly]

Perhaps he’d had a few…

But then again..............

 

[Profpointy]

View attachment 676650

At first? Took me several minutes to suss out it maybe was summat else

 

[Seevio]

Dumplings imply the existence of one large dumple.

 

[Jameshow]

A technician is to be sent to the Arctic Circle to work.
"This is your emergency equipment," says his boss. "It consists of a box with various distress flares, a radio and a deck of playing cards."
"What are the cards for?" asks the technician.
"If the distress flares don't work," says the boss, "and the radio is completely frozen, take the deck of cards and start a game of Solitaire. It won't take long before someone taps you on the shoulder and tells you to put the nine of spades on the ten of diamonds ..."

🤔🤔🤔

 

[colly]

Dumplings imply the existence of one large dumple.

Dumplings are the young of a dumple.

 

[FishFright]

I was reading in the newspaper today that over 30% of baby food sold in supermarkets is contaminated with heavy metals.
I guess that explains why babies are so dumb.

And why thy put weight on so quickly