Any good jokes ... ?

[tyred]

 

[craigwend]

 

[mistyoptic]

 

[Dayvo]

(words aren’t needed)

 

[tyred]

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

I went into the library and ask the librarian where the self-help books were

She said she could show me but that would defeat the point in them

 

[Dayvo]

 

[tyred]

 

[Dayvo]

 

[Toshiba Boy]

 

[Dayvo]

 

[roadrash]

 

[Profpointy]

View attachment 635333

Reminds me of a couple of true stories which I think I posted before but worth repeating

Back in the 60s my caving club had done and expedition to Yugoslavia as it then was. They were camping in the mountains and had been warned there might be bears. A pal of mine and his mate were sharing a tent and were woken up in the night by scratching on the tent canvas. Naturally they were more than a little concerned but eventually the other guy was so freaked out he got out of the tent to investigate. It turned out they'd camped on some kind of toad migration route and the toads were hopping along, climbing up the side of their tent and sliding down the other side. In reality the chances of actually seeing a European bear must be pretty low, and I suspect they are far more likely to run off than attack unless you bothered their cubs or whatever

Another story from a friend of a friend doing geology field work in Greenland and a polar bear sat on his tent and he cowered in the corner until this bear's arse shaped bulge got up and wandered off. Polar bears are obviously a far more serious matter to say the least. Anyhow he got away with it

 

[tyred]

Reminds me of a couple of true stories which I think I posted before but worth repeating

Back in the 60s my caving club had done and expedition to Yugoslavia as it then was. They were camping in the mountains and had been warned there might be bears. A pal of mine and his mate were sharing a tent and were woken up in the night by scratching on the tent canvas. Naturally they were more than a little concerned but eventually the other guy was so freaked out he got out of the tent to investigate. It turned out they'd camped on some kind of toad migration route and the toads were hopping along, climbing up the side of their tent and sliding down the other side. In reality the chances of actually seeing a European bear must be pretty low, and I suspect they are far more likely to run off than attack unless you bothered their cubs or whatever

Another story from a friend of a friend doing geology field work in Greenland and a polar bear sat on his tent and he cowered in the corner until this bear's arse shaped bulge got up and wandered off. Polar bears are obviously a far more serious matter to say the least. Anyhow he got away with it

A friend of my Dad's who emigrated to Canada in the late '60s and took a job as a lorry driver on some sort of logging route always liked to tell the story of his first trip. When he pulled over to sleep for the night he decided to stretch his legs first and got out of the cab and walked around the back of the trailer where he came face to face with a grizzly bear. He ran back to the cab as fast as he could and wound up the window and locked the doors and never looked out until morning.

 

[Dayvo]