Any good jokes ... ?

[ClichéGuevara]

https://www.cyclechat.net/threads/any-good-jokes.78142/page-1000#post-6210954

AMENDUM:

Aldi and Lidl have now increased the offer to two for one.

 

[Andy_R]

For those of you who are unsure how the new tier system works, here's a simple explanation:

Tier 1: Pints
Tier 2: Pints with chips
Tier 3: No pints.

Hope this helps.

 

[Andy_R]

I have just been banned from Pets at Home...

 

[postman]

Well as the thread title is "good jokes" I fear it will be a very small book

It will still be bigger than the Yorkshireman 's book of free gifts.

 

[PaulB]

And now for today's song.

Whoa Black Betty
Anagram

Boat belt wacky
Anagram

Black Betty had a child
Anagram

Hatchback badly tiled
Anagram.

Sing along now...

 

[swee'pea99]

View attachment 560308

Hilarious. 323 dead - what's not to laugh at.

 

[roadrash]

Hilarious. 323 dead - what's not to laugh at.

shock horror ....some people dont share the same sense of humour, if you dont like it , then report it, after all its down to the mods to decide what is suitable or not, not you, i will live with whatever they decide

 

[Once a Wheeler]

You can have additional sections on Famous Belgians and Great Jewish Sportmen to add some girth.

Where famous Belgians are concerned, the joke is usually on the raconteur: https://www.cyclechat.net/threads/the-post-brexit-thread.251777/post-6161097

 

[postman]

In the doghouse this morning.I ate all the after eights before half past seven last night.

 

[PaulB]

In the doghouse this morning.I ate all the after eights before half past seven last night.

Jail would be too good for your sort.

Mind you, I've no place to comment; I put a spoon in the fork drawer! Twenty Hail Marys for me on that one.

 

[postman]

Jail would be too good for your sort.

Mind you, I've no place to comment; I put a spoon in the fork drawer! Twenty Hail Marys for me on that one.

Oh I can go one better than that.Yesterday I went out for some Gaviscon,while you are there being four pints of semi skimmed milk home.Back home I had picked up a six pinta.We had to rearrange the fridge to Get it in. the four pinta has it's own shelf.

 

[PaulB]

Oh I can go one better than that.Yesterday I went out for some Gaviscon,while you are there being four pints of semi skimmed milk home.Back home I had picked up a six pinta.We had to rearrange the fridge to Get it in. the four pinta has it's own shelf.

Deportation!

 

[roadrash]

Ametuers the lot of you , I am banished to the wastelands. Why you may ask simply because I put a new toilet roll on the wrong way round

 

[PaulB]

I was talking to an old dear yesterday and asked if she would be on her own at Christmas, she said “yes, sadly“ I said "That’s great can I borrow some of your chairs then?"

 

[oldfatfool]